A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:My BF of 2 years has been living with me for 1.5. He was recently divorced and didn't help me out for the 1st year as he was saving to refinance one of their homes from his divorce. By year 2, he had sold his boat for quite a bit and turned around and bought a laptop which bothered me as he was only contributing to food and some heat (1st year nothing). His divorce baggage had been a strain since day 1 and never seemed to lighten up. His parents were still including the ex, i'd get upset, we'd argue and so on... Now his house is refi'd and he received a court note that she never refinanced the home she got to remove his name and now they are forclosing as she moved out of that home and stopped paying. He now is looking at this problem with lawyer cost ect.. and back in touch with the ex. Was it unfair of me to ask him to leave until he squares away his business as he can't seem to help me financially? I felt awful fighting with him about money as we are not married but I'm a single mom, he made more and he never paid me rent, now this foreclosure issue! He did help with repairs and groceries but that was it. I just couldn't put myself through another year of his past but told him we could work it out when he gets his baggage in the past and I can get a grip on dealign with his family. Does that sound fair?
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female
reader, Basschick  +, writes (27 April 2010):
 I don't think it's so much the money thing, as the "ex" thing that's really bugging you. You feel like there's no end to having to share him with his ex in one form or another. That's the real issue here. It doesn't sound like he's been a total free-loader, since he has paid for some things in spite of his financial problems. It's more than that. But you have to be happy and keep your sanity and this may just be too much drama for you. Do what you need to do to get your life back on track. If you feel you are being used, then it's time to pull the plug.
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