A
female
 ,
anonymous
writes:I moved in with my b/f 3 years ago. He owned a large house, which he bought when he was involved with another woman who had kids. While he was with this woman (only 2 years) they had started remodeling the house. Then she left and the remodeling got stalled. The two years we were together, I worked around the mess but now, I feel it's time to finish the rooms that have been left half-done. I can't seem to get him motivated even though I've offered to pay for half of it. I don't think it's a money-thing because he blows money on other things. The things that need to be done are not difficult to do and well within his capability. So what is the problem???
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 October 2008): It was probably his ex girlfriend leading the remodeling project, not him. Maybe she had a more aggressive personality and demanded him to do things. If he doesn't want to do it, it is his house so there's no point in you shelling out 1/2 of the costs to finish remodeling his house. You are talking in past tense, you say "the two years we were together I walked around the mess" and "he owned a large house" What do you mean? Are you no longer together, does he no longer own that house? Do you currently live in that house now?
A
female
reader, ssuzanne  +, writes (4 October 2008):
Have you tried sitting down and discussing this with him ? Ask him if there is something he needs to bring to an end with his former girlfriend. There could be some that happened in that relationship that is holding him back from actually going forward with you that is completing the renovations of the house.
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