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The memories remain and it still hurts

Tagged as: Breaking up, The ex-factor<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (28 April 2014) 3 Answers - (Newest, 28 April 2014)
A female United Kingdom age 30-35, anonymous writes:

ow do you forget someone you used to be in love with? We were on and off for nearly 3 years.We split up due to mutual agreement as we felt it wasn't working. I got my own place a few months later and he got in touch again and visited 3 times. We ended up being physical and I cried, I don't know why but I wanted him back so bad but thought it would just hurt too much if it failed again. He stopped contacting me after I said no and I slowly moved on. Now I'm usually only in short term relationships but now I'm in one for about 2 years. Can't fault him and I love him to bits, it doesn't feel like when I was with my ex kind of love but I guess he's a different person altogether as he doesn't drink and do drugs but my ex did ( one of the reasons I wanted to end it) So the problem is I am happy now but still can't stop thinking about my ex. I need help in clearing my head and memories coz it still hurts and I'm so confused. Any advice would be gratefully read.

View related questions: drugs, my ex, split up

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A reader, anonymous, writes (28 April 2014):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

You are right about the rose tinted glasses. I know my ex is no good for me but it doesn't help when I accidentally see him around.I do want to stay with my current boyfriend I just want these thoughts out my head. Thank you for your advice

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A reader, anonymous, writes (28 April 2014):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

You are right about the rose tinted glasses. I know my ex is no good for me but it doesn't help when I accidentally see him around.I do want to stay with my current boyfriend I just want these thoughts out my head. Thankyou for your advice

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A female reader, Honeypie United States +, writes (28 April 2014):

Honeypie agony auntMaybe what you really need is to be single for a bit (and I don't mean single as in dating loads of guys or casual sex) but SINGLE as in JUST you. Sort out your feelings.

My guess is you jumped into a relationship with your current BF too soon. You weren't over the ex.

My question to you is this, the reason your ex is on your mind constantly is, is that because you are mentally beating yourself up for being WITH your ex back in the day, or do you miss the ex? And what exactly do you miss about him?

The current relationship is a WHOLE other kettle of fish then what you HAD with your ex. IT should feel differently. But if you are with your current guy because he IS a good guy and you should love him, but you are unsure.. then BE single a while.

You say you are happy now, but you can't stop thinking about your ex. That makes no sense. Live in the now not in the past.

You are looking back with rose colored glasses towards the ex. Take them off and send the thoughts packing.

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