A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I am so sad because when I first was with him we were having sex almost daily now 3 years later it is almost extinct and we have a 3 year old son together. We are bored and sit home all the time and watch tv in seperate rooms and we don't like being next to each other anymore is it wrong for me to want to leave and i am afraid i will hurt my son and he may miss him. I am angry that I became so sick of him I am a stay at home mom and it's driving me crazy and then at other times I want to go give him a hug but he rarely does for me he just sits around watches tv and wonders what we are going to eat next. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, chocoholicforever +, writes (31 January 2012):
You didn't mention what you have done to try to resolve this. Since you are married and have a young son, I think you owe it to your son to at least try to work on and improve your relationship.
No I don't believe that people should stay married when they are miserable but simply because they have kids. that's not good for anyone including the children. the ideal is to stay together because you want to be together and actually love being married to each other, that kind of healthy environment is best for your children too. Thus, I think you should first try to work towards that, leaving your husband may be jumping the gun at this point.
Talk with your husband, but without blaming or criticizing him. Ask him how he feels about this marriage, about you, about his own life, why isn't he happy? what can you do to improve that? Tell him that you're not happy, but again don't blame or criticize him. Tell him that you'd like things to be different and for both of you to be happier.
You might want to go to marriage counseling, but your husband has to be willing, don't drag him if he's not willing, you can still go on your own if he won't, and get some benefit from it.
If, after you have tried your best and you don't see your husband doing his part or even if he is but you're still very unhappy, then by all means leave the marriage.
A
male
reader, Honest Answer +, writes (30 January 2012):
 Maybe there is a reason that one or both of you feel this way. For the sake of your child, you owe it to him to see a doctor in order to rule out a medical cause for your husbands lack of sex drive.
If the doctor rules out a medical cause, maybe you should consider going your seperate ways. You are still young, and have a lot of life ahead of you. Why rot away in a loveless marriage?
I really do wish you the best.
Jeff
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A
female
reader, chickpea2011 +, writes (30 January 2012):
 Hi,
Sorry you feel this way. If you are not happy, he's not happy either. There's got to be more than just love fading away? Only a few years back, you and your husband were making love like rabbits? I am sure he's making his own mistakes, by not being affectionate, caring, sweet, etc. But, you are probably making your own mistakes, too? Before you make any decisions, you need to reconsider your marriage, at least try before giving up. What's causing the distance? When did start happening? Can you sit down and talk to your husband? It's true that as his wife you need to try to save your marriage, but it's very important that your husband acknowledge the situation and he needs to be willing to work together with you on your marriage. Your husband is not going out, not coming home, behaving suspicious, so its not like he's not interested in being home, so I do believe that with your husband's help, together you can save the marriage. I hope you can find the answers you need, start feeling better, save the marriage and live a happy, successful, long life with your husband and your son as family.
Good luck/best wishes
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