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anonymous
writes: I have been seeing this younger lady for several years. We han not had sex or even kissed. We go out together at least twice a month and we hug at the end of the evening. We to to her place and have coffee and talk. I want to make a move but I am afraid. Sound like a chicken, I know but, I know that I love her more than any woman I have ever met. I am in love for the last time in my life. She is 20 years my younger and she is on my mind first thing in the morning and the last person on my mind at night. She has agreed to go to a christmas party in a week and I want to tell her how I feel. My fear is that I will loose her forever if she does not feel the same about me. How do I tell her? This is for real and I don't need a bull shit answer. Can to give me a true answer or not?
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male
reader, UrsaLoco  +, writes (5 December 2010):
 Almost six years to the day. (I took eyeswideopen's advice and checked the date) To paraphrase Lewis Carrol, "Curiouser & curiouser..." Well, I just hope that it worked out for them. I have my own younger lady to deal with.
--Peace.
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male
reader, CountOnMyHelp  +, writes (14 July 2010):
You Know what if she is your friend your friend you wont lose her but i know your still nervous of asking her right. This is the way to do it. These are your steps to success.Step 1 Mentioning her name tell her your friendship is important to you and dont want to lose the friend ship that you share with herStep 2 Really Important tell her you need to tell her somthing but dont want to force her into anythingStep 3 now this bit is very important tell her the words i think im in love with you. The word think is important.Step 4 If she looks at you like she loves you trust me you will know and if you get that look gaze into her eyes and lean slowly an then if she leans slowly kiss her but only if that connection.If you dont get that look ask her well now i have got that of my chest what do you think do you like me like, like me like me and see what she says she will either exept or say no, if she says no tell her you respect her awnser but you want her to take a couple of weeks to think about it. Good Luck and i hope this work it did for me but remember a soft voice is a loving voice.
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reader, anonymous, writes (5 February 2010): Well i have d same situation as you im 30 shes 22.. im in love with this girl for almost 1 year now.. She knows that im courting her but have not proposed to her yet, cos i havent found d right time and im also scared to lose her... I just asked her once if it was ok to court her but she could not say yes or no... she just smiled and laughed...
Evr since d day we met we alrdy had chemistry, But sometimes she can be hot or cold which is very confusing for me.. i remember we had this romantic date together with her mom and dad it was lyk a dream date.. then d folowing day she was acting strange, as if she was staying away from me i was rily hurt and confused at that tym.. i didnt get mad at her but said to myself maybe she needed more time... cos i was alrdy planing to propose to her and mayb she knew.. so i gave her time to think didnt txt or col her much, and everytime we would see each other id just smile... then i got busy we lost track..
Then later on after 2 mos.. we got in touch agen.. but this time she was a bit different.. she was more nicer this time and more sensitive.. she's lyk sending me signals to court her again.. but this time, i was more careful... D gud thing is weve gotten more closer this time and we went out more often... `Were rily close right now, shes also more affectionate and sometimes hold my hand or lean especially wen we would have our pictures taken.. she would make me feel lyk im hers, sometimes shed give me this look that makes me melt.. what do you think should i lay down d cards? my answer is definitely yes if i would be able to find d ryt time and place.. i wouldnt let that moment pass me by, even if i know theres a risk involve... i love this person and i think i should tell her even if im alrdy showing it in my actions.. Good luck to both of us.. and god bles..
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female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (28 October 2008):
 Look at the date...
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male
reader, kozzy2006 +, writes (28 October 2008):
hi my name is koryn and i woude like to say to you make that move man and if you do lose her how can you call her a frind frinds are ment to stick thou thick and thin at all time expesherly the releshonship you have got with her and as the tale gose theres more fish swimming in the see gust take the risk and take it.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (28 February 2008): My friend, I hope you have made up your mind already. If not, and for the benefit of others who may be in the same predicament, here's my advice:She needs to know that you care for her, and you need to take it off your chest. Find a place where both of you are comfortable but has a modicum of privacy, and then tell her in your own words. Something like, "___, there's something I have to tell you. We've going out for quite some time, and in that while I've found myself thinking more of you, day and night. You're the first thing that comes into my mind in the morning, the last at night. There's only one truth in my mind - I think I love you."
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 September 2007):
Speaking as a woman, even if she does not love you as more than a friend, if she is half the woman you think she is, you will not lose her if you tell her your feelings. Try telling her as a considerate friend, not as a desperate lover, you can get a woman to start thinking about you that way if you find out what she wants in a mate. If you have not idea what she wants in a man, you had better find out before you tell her. If she wants someone to hold open doors for her, bring her flowers, you can find out that without even asking. If she doesn't even notice that you open the car door or give her a "friendship" rose--yellow is the color of friendship roses-then do you really want her or the idea of her?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (10 August 2007): I have the exact same situation right now! Only to complicate things I am together with my girlfriend for 13 years now and not even single. I have met the girl in question in a bar where she works, and from the 1st moment we just have this amazing chemistry going on.
As with you: I love her more than any woman I have ever met. She is 18 years my younger and she’s also the first thing on my mind in the morning and the last thing on my mind at night.
We are spending more time together than with our own partners. Yes, she has a boyfriend unfortunately. She’s here almost every day and spends hours and hours here.
A month ago I took her to this party and we had an awesome time together. Afterwards we went to a hotel to relax, but nothing happened because I was afraid that me trying anything would ruin our friendship, and I could not stand to loose her in my life!
I know she’s real fond of me, she might even love me, but I’m not sure in what way. She gives of very mixed signals. Sometimes very sexual oriented, but sometimes she makes remarks that totally go against that again, so I really don’t know.
For now I have decided to take it easy. Keep on doing stuff with her, and see where it will take us.
Good luck!
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 January 2005):
Well my friend I've had a similar situation before. Not knowing weither to
tell the girl I love her or not to since the fear of losing the friend would
be bad enough in the end if she rejects you. One thing you need to know is
Love is from both sides not just one. You may feel that way for her but does
she to you? That is something you need to find out first and foremost. Know
that all beginning relationships should progress slow to give room to expand
and grow indeptly. Get to know her even more. Of course all girls are
different in ways. A girl I know who was with a guy for nearly half a year
yet she left him for a guy she knows only for four months and married him.
Girls seeks happiness ultimately its weither the guy can provide the needs
to satisfy her or not. In my opinion I wouldn't go straight foward with her
just yet till you are mroe or less certain there is chemistry between you
both. Afterwards by all means if you know her well enough and she knows you
the same way, pop the question. Since you say you're too much of a chicken
to say stuffs a easy way would be through the phone or the internet such as
AIM or via email. Peoples often get nervious and cramp up when talking
directly to the person so rather to do such confrontations do it in words
and elaborate why you can't tell her face to face like "I'm too scared to
tell you face to face so I have to write it in (a email or whatever) how i
feel about you" ect ect... My last bit of advice is this: Though I would say
take things slow dont do it as slow as a snail moving. Last thing you need
is someone else moving into your territory and taking your girl away, then
you would be crying so bad after.
Well I hope my advice proves to be of any value and either to use it or not
is ultimately up to you. Just know that you have to tell her when the time
comes cause its always one side confessing rather than waiting for something
to happen. If she ultiamtely objects to your love than least you know you
gave it your all and hold no regrets to. You wont lose a friend since they
would consider you close since you know her that well enough but it'll be
hard definately for you to move on. I hope you may find your guiding light
to the answers you seek~
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