A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hey aunts I want and need advice. A little background about me, I'm soon to be a 24 year old college student who works like crazy. Who's nice,funny and loves to shop. I got my 1st real boyfriend a couple months ago and wow is all I can say. He was so nice, attractive and semi funny. I made him laugh more than he did which was ok with me. But our relationship was lovely, we were crazy about each other and we spent alot of time together when we were free ( I'm very busy )He could tell I didn't have alot of relationships which was very embarrassing to me, I never told him he was my 1st real boyfriend but I think he could tell. I am a tiny bit shy but not to the Point where I can't be heard or seen. When he would introduce me to his friends as his girlfriend I would still think to myself "wow I have a boyfriend" corny I know but I waited so long. I never settled, I never had 1 night stands, I never went hunting for a man. So of course I was excited with him. But sadly, he had to move away which hurt me. He moved due to lack of work and yes I cried. He moved to another state ( NY ) he had too because his bills where piling up ( had an apt with a roommate ) and his dad offered to help ( he's 26 ) we did breakup before he let, it was a mutual breakup. We both agreed that we didn't want to have a long distance relationship so it was over. I do care for him and would love for him to move back but I'm not putting my life on hold for him. Last time we talked he said he would always want me, he always said that even when we had arguments.But I want advice on "waiting" for the one. I can honestly say I don't believe in that anymore. I was holding on to those sayings such as "waiting for the one will be worth it" "when u least expect it, the one will come" "he'll come when he's ready for you" etc.But after waiting all that time and watching everyone say their in love or he's the one or just having that someone is amazing etc. I feel like I waisted my time on "waiting" I don't regret waiting but I do feel like what's the point? I "waited" and got my 1st boyfriend and like a blink of an eye he was gone. I have alot of feelings towards it, I'm happy for everyone who's found the "one" I love to see people happy, I love to see couples and all that good stuff. I do know no relationship is perfect, we had arguments, disagreements and all of the above. I won all of them hahaha But it's just how I feel, what if I "wait" again and I be 85 before the one comes along. Yes, I'm very dramatic but I'm just saying. I just don't feel the same I did. Do some people "deserve" to find the one sooner than others? Am I doing something wrong? Some of my friends said I should wait again, and honestly I got offended not because of what they said, but because waiting isn't as easy as they make it seems. Plus, they can't wait to save their lives. I just lost hope in that "waiting for the one" crap. I do still have fun, shop, read, go out, I'm a work freak meaning I can work my butt off and smile about that. I enjoy myself butttt having a good boyfriend isn't something I don't want. I just give up and I have been dating, even cutting back from work a tiny bit to do so. I just lost hope, I never thought I would but I have. Any advice for me? Plz and thank you
View related questions:
long distance, roommate, shy Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (30 June 2015): Let me start of by saying...nobody likes to be aloneRelationships is like dancing...you wait in a chair eager to dance with someone you'll think will last forever and a few options1 wait until someone asked you to dance2 look around the ballroom and find someone you like3 wait for anyone to finish their dance and wait your turn4 or God forbid wait for anyo who hasnt yet come homeIts normal to panic and feel awkward about emotions when your single...you may feel incomplete or botted up not having someone to share things with or have someone you really trust by your side... It may feel a bit unfair to say that if you choose to wait it may take a long time... But honestly when love comes time is not a factor... No matter how long you had each other will just be a number... And you'll forgst the days you've waited for forever.Life is fun and doesnt have to be hard if you just enjoy what you have but if you really like you're previous bf ...the world will not stop spinning if he ever gets to return.... Its what you do with the scenario life has given yo. If he chose to stay will you love him more? Or less? And if you do feel lime moving on ...bear with all the single guys and girls waiting... You'll get another turn to dance... Just be sure to keep yourself amused while you wait
|
