A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend is in Iraq. I am 5 1/2 months pregnant. We got together while we were AIT. I love him, but I have come to realize that I am not in love with him. How do I tell him that I love him, but I'm not in love with him? And should I even tell him? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Emilysanswers  +, writes (16 August 2008):
If you haven't seen your boyfriend for ages then it is only natural to question your feelings. They may come flooding back when he does. And you are pregnant so that can affect lots of things, I've hear of women who start divorce proceedings because they hate their husband so much and then give birth and realise it was the hormones.
I know having an army boyfriend is really really hard. Here in the Uk the army doesn't give any support until you are married.
I wouldn't tell him until you are sure of your feelings. But if you really really can't be with him anymore then write to him, explain and be honest. My hubbie went to Kosovo (years ago) and his girlfriend (of the time) decided not to tell him what was going on and just started sleeping with someone else instead. So he came home to find out she had dumped him 3 months earlier and not told him about it. Not nice.
Good Luck!! xx
A
female
reader, Tigerspaw357  +, writes (16 August 2008):
I guess its too late to ask why you did not prevent yourself from getting pregnant and obviously you are going to have the baby. Forget about your feelings or his - now the baby comes first. There are too many women making the decision to have children without the consent of the father and then making the decision to raise them alone. You have to tell him because he has the right to know about his child. If he does not welcome the child then you have another situation. Don't fight or use the child as a means of controlling him. He has to pay child support and should have visitation. If he is with someone else you have to learn to be civil and do what is best for the new life you choose to bring into the world. However, if he loves you and you love him - being in love can still happen esp. if you two are friends. Friends often last forever, lovers frequently part. Good Luck and pssst use b/c next time okay?
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