A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Sometimes when my boyfriend and I are having sex, he goes limp...I have NEVER had this issue before with anyone I have been with.I haven't had many partners, and he is the first and only one who has been with me since I had a child (3 years ago) after my husband and I divorced. So, I have some Mommy body issues, but nothing extreme in the sense that I think my body is disgusting or anything. It flabbier and has extra skin, etc...not like it was pre baby.What gives? He tells me he loves me, should I take this personally?
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reader, anonymous, writes (17 March 2014): I had the same problem with my boyfriend and it was because the condoms were makeing it numb...it could be something like that.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 March 2014): Do be too worried. This is hurting him inside more than you. 9 times out of 10 erectile dysfunction in a healthy, young to middle aged male is because of external factors - stress from work, not enough sleep, past trauma, etc. The worst part is that it only makes it worse the next time round (more performance anxiety). My advice? Initiate sex, get kinky and voice your approval with moans and dirty talk. Seriously, it worked for me.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (12 March 2014): Hey this might sound a little crazy, but I have the same problem with my girlfriend and we only just realised that it's cause the condoms we use are too small! That could be same problem as yours, worth a shot. Good luck ??
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (7 March 2014): No its not you at all, I had the same problem until I got a prescription for an ed drug. It just happens...
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (7 March 2014):
 One Caveat about two condoms at once... they break more easily that way... so if you use condoms for protection from STDs and as birth control I would not use that method.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (7 March 2014):
 I agree with Cerberus. It's NOT about you.
Double bag (use two condoms) it makes him feel less but it can also make him stay hard. Cock ring, same thing.
Also consider the positions you two use.
Again some men who jerk off A LOT are used to a VERY tight grip - a woman's vagina is NOT EVER as tight as a hand. So that can play into it as well.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (7 March 2014):
If he loves you it's personal. OH you meant his "going limp"
nope that's not about you at all. sometimes men just sadly lose their erection. It's not about you at all. and I'm sure he's not any happier than you are.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 March 2014): How can you take it personally when it's only sometimes? Can't exactly be a problem on your end then.
And no you shouldn't, it can happen, OP. Little Elvis doesn't always want to perform. Sometimes he's had too much alcohol, other times he's not really in the mood but you are, sometimes it's just always been an issue for him because he loses focus during the act.
Try a cock ring, see if that helps.
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