A
male
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Though i know many girls as friends i have very little experience with relationships and when i do get numbers i don't even get to a date.Now i have known one girl for 2 years now. She approached me and each time i see her she always comes up and in a way like no other girl does. She's even introduced herself to my friends. I have her friends always ask me if i have spoken to her. We had good conversations at the beginning and she did say yes to going out too but never got to a date. However i got desperate and i sent crazy texts to get back to a decent conversation but as nothing was happening i sent texts to end the friendship and move but each time she replied saying she wanted to be friends. Recently i received a text off her saying she has a serious medical condition but she was being looked after.I would only expect a close friend to tell me about something as serious as that so i am not sure why she sent it if we are not that close. I have rang but got no answer and i have sent texts maybe once or twice a week wishing her well and if there is anything i can do and when she's better to go for a drink or a meal. I really like her and want to see her but now i am not sure whether she is still not well or not speaking though she has never once said to stop contacting her. I am not sure what to do for the best. Should i still contact her or move on.
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female
reader, dearkelja  +, writes (11 November 2007):
 I think you should try to stay connected. Try to minimize your expectations to friendship. Sometimes friendship works itself to more, sometimes it does not. She may be going through some very difficult times. I am kind of going through a similar situation where I write the texts and he responds to 1 of 4 of mine. He doesn't want me to stop hanging around but he doesn't seem to want to escalate things either even though he has told me he really likes me. But he too has "some kind of condition." I think that it is important to go at the rate of the slowest mover, if that makes sense. I am now giving him space (not texting or calling) in the hopes that he misses me. I have also reduced my expectations in the event he never makes contact again. I do know what you are going through and believe me it hurts. Good luck to you. I hope everything is ok with your friend.
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