A
male
age
,
anonymous
writes:Hi, every body, well my EX and I got back together year an a half ago, broke up cause after 7 years she never told me she loved me, when we got back together she said it once, I have told her many times, she says she has a wall up.But after all this time you would think the wall would come down, I am very romantic, I sweet talk to her all the time, open car doors, poems, hold hands, tell her how beautiful she is, we get along great, but when I say I love you nothing back, I almost feel like breaking up with her again.I feel like I love her but am not in love with her, I've told her that, after we got back together, I was honest and told her I fell in love with some one else, when we were broken up, but the one I fell in love with, left me for her ex who beat her up all the time, I guess she didn't like being treated like a women is supposed to be treated, what am asking girls is should I stay with a women that I love, but not in love with, I still miss the other one.But I wouldn't take her back, never got closure, I think thats whats bothers me, I just walk away, I couldn't compete with a guy who who beats women. I didn't even ask why, and I do not never contact her, I wonder if she ever misses me, when he's beating on her, just cant figure why women go back to a guy like that after being with a good guy. THANKS
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (6 December 2013):
 SVC gave you a good, thorough answer. I would add, only, "When a woman doesn't tell you that she loves you, take her at her WORD." (Been there; done that.)
Good luck....
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (5 December 2013):
 you have two issues going on
issue one: the ex that left that you feel no closure with...
or rather you think you haven't gotten closure with.
you have your closure... her choices now that she's not your partner are not your concern. what she thinks or feels is not your concern. Yes it sucks to think "hey I'm such a nice guy and I get dumped for a loser that beats her" but everyone has their own demons to deal with and you can't fix her.
your best bet is to accept that YOU did your best and move on from her.
Secondly the woman you returned to..
you should end this relationship as well.
she's not giving you want you need/want and that's a limitation of HER. she is who she is and you can't change her.
My husband when i met him and we got serious told me "I will NEVER say "I love you" well he says it now... but it took him nearly a year of marriage to be able to do it and it still involves alcohol consumption in order to be said.
you will never love the returnee gf the way you need to want to... better to end it now and both of you move on
remember to only love a person where they are not their potential.
...............................
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