A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:Recently after another classic domestic between hubby (59) and me, I was at the end of my tether... I asked hubby how he would like me to talk about his mother in the same manner of profanity he speaks to me day in day out? Later I did apologize, for I used the same strong words of profanity that only he uses. Nonetheless he couldn’t wait to tell his (interfering) mother, who now bans me from visiting and where hubby now hides (after any huge argument)... the rest of his siblings have his version of details; which is not in context. Hubby refuses to correct this as he’ll lose face with them. “He’d rather they still think badly of me” As infuriating this makes me; it appears 2 faced, as his good family appears to accept him being verbally and physically abusive to me? But when I stand up to his abuse by using it as an example; he typically turns the table, to get the focus off himself!? They have all said; they’ll "disown" him if he returns home to me, his mother said, she'll pack up and leave him!I feel it is our private matter to sort out... although the years of one-sided stories of me have made his family bias. Yet his/our close friends can vouch the total opposite, as they are aware of the real goings on.I am in two minds; one, to send snapshots to his siblings and secondly send snapshots to his siblings (excluding his mother)?I’m looking to settle the wrongs, once and for all. I would appreciate your thoughts, not for me to roll over and let him lie. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (17 May 2018):
 You say on one hand that you feel this is between you and your spouse, yet YOU are the one who wants to drag his siblings into this?
Is that a tad... contradictory?
So it would be OK for you to point out HIS faults to THEM but not vice verse?
OP, YOU are the one CHOOSING to BE with this verbally abusive man.
Why?
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 May 2018): No you should not because they would not believe it anyway.What you should do is leave him.The beatings will get worse.Next time he might kill you or you might be put in jail just for defending yourself.I understand you want them to know the truth but for years they have been fed lies and they would never believe you so why waste energy and effort on that.Use your energy and effort to find a good divorce attorney.Get a good settlement.Live safe.
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