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female
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anonymous
writes: Trying to stop myself from falling for this guy yet again (he's an ex boyfriend who seems to keep coming back into my life). Everyone tells me he's a bad guy and I can do way better and I know why they say it, as he has a history of cheating and if you don't know him well then he can seem like a bad bloke (one of those people- If he likes you he'll make you feel like there's no one else in the world, if he doesn't like you then you should fear for your safety). I promised myself I'd follow my head instead of my heart but he has this hold over me. He's one of the only people in the world that can make me smile for no reason, and we can talk for hours about absolutely nothing and still feel as though we know eachother even better by the end of it. Should I give in and follow my instincts if my heart is screaming his name, or should i do the sensible thing, the thing that everyone else tells me I should do, and the thing that will stop me from getting hurt, and tell him I want to move on from him?
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female
reader, valmaniac +, writes (16 November 2006):
I'm sort of in a similar situation, been off/on w/my ex for a couple of months and because I've told my friends all the stuff that happens they think he's bad for me and I should forget about him. Kind of like why are you still putting yourself thru this? Well, I understand where you are coming from. I really love my ex & we had talked about marriage etc and questions were just never asked/answered so it's hard to figure out where things might go. Just last night I was doing the 'follow my head or follow my heart' thing too. I'm following my heart because even if things don't work out at least you know and it's not the end of the world..there's other guys out there & you'll find the right one. I guess what I'm saying is, what you want is what matters..not what everyone says you 'should' do. If you make a mistake, at least you'll know and you'll learn from it. Give it a shot and see what happens. Take it day by day, don't throw yourself all in at once. See what happens. That's what I'm going to do. Test the waters a little again. Hope that helps.
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