A
male
age
30-35,
*ieldsofGreen
writes:I've been going out with my current girlfriend for a little over a year now. She used to be quite the player and party animal, but since we started going out, she has taken different measures to prove that she is loyal to only me. She no longer goes to parties, always lets me know where she's going when she goes out, and when ever she meets a guy, the first thing she says is that she has a boyfriend. I have never told her to do any of this, it's all been of her own accord. I had complete trust in her because all of this, but as of recently, I've been put into a dilemma. Before we started dating, she had gotten into some trouble with another guy and desperately needed some help. She went to one of her other guy friends and he helped her out of her problem, but she then was in debt to him and owed him whatever kind of favor he needed later on. A few weeks ago, she told me that her friend wanted his favor redeemed. Her choices were to either: pay him $100, send him nude pictures, or to have sex with him. My girlfriend told me all about this, and I told her that she should just pay him the $100. Both my girlfriend and I are very short on money at the moment, but she told me she would just pay him the $100. I offered to help her pay it off, but she refused to let me help her (she can be a bit stubborn about solving her own problems). So naturally since I had so much trust in my girlfriend, the thought of her sending nude pics or having sex with this other guy never even crossed my mind. However, yesterday I learned that instead of paying him the money, she had chosen to send him some nude pics. Now, if she had just sent him one plain picture of her standing naked, I wouldn't be worrying all that much. But I stumbled upon the instant messaging conversation she had with the guy, and she didn't just send one picture. She sent one, then he asked for another with a different pose and she took and sent another one. I didn't look through their whole conversation, so I don't exactly how many she took and sent, and I have not seen any of the pictures myself. I don't know what to do. I haven't confronted my girlfriend about it yet, and I know her. She has a problem with putting me ahead of herself in certain situations, and she knew that I knew, then she would feel so bad, she would leave me because she wouldn't want to hurt me anymore. Yes, I am extremely displeased with her actions, but I love her a lot and I'm a forgiving person. What troubles me is that she lied to me about paying him the money, she sent him multiple pictures at his request instead of just sending him one and being done with it. I know that she regrets this decision and really feels bad about it, which is why I can see myself forgiving her later on if she ever decided to come out and tell me on her own. So, I don't know what I should do. Should I confront her? Should I wait to see if she comes out and tells me on her own? I lover her a lot and I would have a very hard time getting over her if we ever broke up, but I need some outside opinions.
View related questions:
broke up, debt, has a boyfriend, money, nude pictures, player, she has a boyfriend Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Western3589 +, writes (19 August 2010):
 Confront her, always bring truth to light. Better than living a lie. Nothing is set in stone yet of this, so you need to ask her, and figure out the whole story. Did she have a problem sending those pics? Was she enthusiastic? It's all upsetting going thru, but everything works itself in the end, just know that:)
|
