| A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: I need a little advice for my situation, I'm with my gf for more than three years but its been kinda of a roller coaster (good time, bad times etc') but I feel we have some fundamental problems like some miscommunications, our communication is not open enough and I feel it can be much better (in the past it was even worse, everytime we opened something to talk about it would become an argument), she is insecure (despite me trying to help her) - she doesn't like herself too much, she doesnt have faith in me or anyone else (her words), she is pretty high maintenence, can be demending and on the other hand she doesn't have many hobbies or stuff like that so she gets bored quickly which makes her more dependent on me.I like my space and time to do stuff as I have many interests and hobbies which I mostly put aside for her in the last three years, but I kinda feel I had enough of her, I don't feel she REALLY loves me, I don't think she treats me well or appreciates me enough, makes me think that maybe I'm waisting time.On th other hand I do have feelings for her, she is still important for me and I wouldn't want to hurt her, in the last couple of months I was thinking about breaking up (I have never proposed that but she tried to break up several times in the past), it's not working THAT well for us but I feel it sooo hard doing it.We do get along sometime and have our fun and we are close to eachother's families, we are used to eachother etc'I feel like it would be pretty hard breaking up and also a bit afraid that she won't stay friends with me (she said it some time ago), what do you think about the situation and what should I do?Thanks!
View related questions:
insecure Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465  +, writes (8 March 2012):
 Break up with her and expect that you and she cannot/will not remain "friends." Get on with your life...
A
male
reader, Johnnz  +, writes (8 March 2012):
I've been here. the problem is she doesnt, like most young girls, have hobbies. You either need to find something your both into or keep doing what you enjoy. My relationship with the mother of my son was exactly like this. Tell her how you feel about her, keep up with doing your own hobbies and see how it goes. Do not let her rule your life. if she thinks your upto no good, do not try and calm her down. just walk away and let her come to her senses. she may dump you, if so, so be it. you know your not upto anything and if she knows the real you then she will relise its all in her head... sadly, the mother of my son never did and we parted.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 March 2012): In the end it's up to you what you do. In my opinion if you are not happy in the relationship, and you can't work on the problems together to overcome them then it is time to leave. She may not be friends with you after you break up, some people can and some people can't. I personally am the type of person who can't, or won't. I think it's best to go your separate ways, but that's me. Good Luck
...............................
|
