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Should I be forced to invite my cousin to my bfs small birthday dinner?

Tagged as: Dating, Family<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (24 May 2011) 2 Answers - (Newest, 24 May 2011)
A female Australia age 36-40, anonymous writes:

Today I called my mum to invite her and my father to my boyfriends birthday dinner in a couple of weeks. I explain that we don't have a set date put aside but heads up - it will be in two weeks. Immediately she tells me that as my cousin will be here in Australia

- he can attend too. My cousin is 50 year old male (same age as my parents) who I don't know.

I stop her and say I'm not sure as my partners parents may pay for dinner she can't exactly tell me who's coming.

She says her and my father will pay for themselves anyway- no one pays their way etc. Etc.

At this stage I'm annoyed. Sure I look forward to meeting my cousin but my mum starts telling me they won't be attending unless my cousin is. That it would be inappropriate. My own brothers aren't invited to the dinner!!! It's just us and each set of parents.

Is it rude of me or is my mum being a demanding control freak? Cause I feel it's the latter!!

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A female reader, tennisstar88 United States +, writes (24 May 2011):

tennisstar88 agony auntActually I can see your mom's side, because they don't want to look like bad hosts when your cousin is visiting. Then again like Honeypie said, a 50yr old man is capable of entertaining himself.

In your defense, I can see where it's unnecessary for your cousin to come along. I bet he would feel a bit out of place, rather like the 7th wheel. Point this all out to your mother. There's no reason why he can't stay at home and visit with your brothers or even go on some solo sight seeing.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States +, writes (24 May 2011):

Honeypie agony auntI would ask your BF see how he feels and go from there.

PS your cousin is old enough to entertain himself for one night, but I would invite him, if it's rare that you get to see him.

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