A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:a year ago i kissed one of my best friends after a night out, it was all just a bit of fun after a few too many, we remained really close and he often stayed with me, although we were always affectionate to one another we never slept together. It seemed in our friendship group we were the closely and he was always staying with me after nights out together. However a few months ago he started telling me he had feelings for me and things have been getting rather complicated. I had a fling with one of his friends unknowing of his feelings and in fact my own... I finally realized my own feelings for him months later and decided to tell him one night, to which he felt the same, however literally a week later he began seeing someone, and distanced himself from me. Because we are amoung the same friends, I have to watch him with this girl and its really hurting me because of the feelings i expressed towards him. I really love him as a friend and hate the fact this is ruining my friendship with him. Is it possible he simply didnt mean these things he told me? Sometimes i think it may be because hes just not attracted to me as this girl is very pretty, iv only told my closest friends my feelings but i feel humiliated of these since he has started flaunting this girl in front of me...i find it all so confusing, when ever we would discuss our feelings alcohol was involved so have i simply taken too much of what he said to heart, i feel like a fool, but i miss the closeness i had with him for this year. Should I give up on him? Was he just messing me around? And how can i stop this ruining our friendship, i feel humiliated and vulnerable.
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reader, anonymous, writes (4 April 2009): Well, If I were you, I would tell him how much you still care about him. And if you do in fact still like him, tell him all your feelings. And if you dont like his girlfriend tell him and maybe he'll rethink his thoughts.
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