A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Hi! My problem is that when I feel that I like a girl I fall for her hard and fast!!! The reason for this is that I don't see a girl so that I can get into her pants but because I see a future with her. And that's precisely what my problem is. I met this girl and lets just put it this way, it was fate that made us meet. An important thing to note is that she doesn't live in the same city as me. The first thing that you'll think is that it's a long distance relationship issue. Well, it actually isn't completely because we meet anywhere from two to three times a month. Now, the main issue is age. She is significantly older than I am. At first, I kept my distance knowing that things would not work because of this issue. But after we started hanging out (as friends) I realized that she is everything I've been looking for in a girl. So, I thought about all the pros and cons and decided that I would ask her what she felt about us being together. She said she needed some time to think about it. Almost 2 months go by, and we still keep meeting and I asked her again as I was falling for her more and more. After much convincing, she finally told me that she loves being with me and that I'm a wonderful guy but she can't overcome the fact that she is a lot older than I am. I told her that I said she misses me when shes not with me, but the age issue is too major for her to overlook. The person that I am, I'm still stuck on her and as much as I try to not think of her as anything more than a friend, I can't!!! =( Can anyone help me with this problem please?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 November 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks! I guess it's just a matter of time. It'll heal so long as try not to think of her...
A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (2 November 2010):
Well I was close. Considerable age gap, that she can't overcome. She may change her mind in time the more you guys stay friends, if that's something you can continue. But like you said you fall hard and fast..You're going to have to look at you're a fantastic fun loving guy, but she can't overcome the age gap. It's just not meant to be my dear, sorry.
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 November 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the question14
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A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (2 November 2010):
Well how big of an age gap? Are we talking a cougar here?
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A
female
reader, natasia +, writes (2 November 2010):
How much older is she?
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 November 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for the answer!! The thing is we chose to be "friends" however, it doesn't seem that way at all! We talk for 6-7 hours at times about things that only people in a relationship talk about. Long story short, we both care about each other a lot and are crazy for one another. But, we just can't be together. To top it all, the person I am, I can't still keep in touch with her and meet her etc and only think of her as a friend. I care for her way too much and knowing that I can't be with her just kills me inside! I try and keep busy so as not to think of her, but the second my mind is a bit idle she pops up and so do all the feelings. It's like I can't completely forget about her, neither can I be with her! Oh and I forgot to mention earlier, I'm not only attached to her, but also to her family which makes things worse cause her family is super attached to me as well! =(
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A
female
reader, [?]BitterSweetFinale;[?] +, writes (2 November 2010):
Getting over people you like alot, is a huge factor.. It is indeed a hard adjustment. But you have to. Keep in touch with her, you'll meet someone just as good if not better suited for you in the future. People come and go, remember that.. Do more things to keep her off your mind, and have excitement that's always nice! Good luck hun. xoxo.
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