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male
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anonymous
writes: I have been with my g/f for over 2 years, we argue a lot, but I feel that we do love one another. The other day we got in an arguemnt over the phone. She didn't come home, and went to her dad's house. On the phone she keeps saying "You won't change. I can't do this anymore". It's been almost a month now.She still says she loves me, but that I won't change, and that I didn't appreciate the things she did. I admitted that I made mistakes, but she just seems cold. She comes to vist me, but doesn't act the same. She said our love didn't feel "right". She said she never felt loved. She says she is going to get her own place and she can't move back in with me. What do I do? I love her so much, I can't keep going on by myself (she left me the beginning of this month). I try to respect her decision. I've done all that I can do to plead with her that I want her back and want to try to work things out. Should I give up? I don't know what to do. Reply to this Question
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male
reader, Mr.Ed +, writes (19 December 2005):
 I agree again with KellyO. give it time. Maybe you did make some mistakes and rushing back in will only draw out those mistakes and add to them. You care O.K. we figured that out with the letter now ponder what went wrong and ask her for her help. Tell her that you want to be a better man if not for her then someone else. You need to know what exactly you did wrong before you go messing up another relationship. You may not get it right even then but you owe it to yourself to find out why and what you did. Prevent any relevant mistakes from happening again and treat her like you would want to be treated. Good Luck. Ed
A
female
reader, kellyO  +, writes (19 December 2005):
 Hi dear, u seem to have cause alot of heartache for this girl. i am happy u have admitted it but the problem is that she doesnt feel things will change. There is nothing u can do here, the decision to come back to you is entirely hers.if u still love her then why not give her some more time to think. Also, in the meantime u can be her friend. try not to crowd her too much but let her see the side in u she obvious said was lacking.Also u need to give yourself time to think and reflect what really went wrong in the relationship. it will help u in future relationships and also if she decides to come back.U say u quarrel alot what causes this problem? There might have been alot of communication gap between you two. You should always encourage each other to air your views and look for ways to improve things.She also mentioned that she never felt appreciated and love. there are many ways to do this, telling a person u love them, flowers help, taking her out, complimenting your partners looks or when she does something for u like cooking a meal e.t.c.I wish u the best and try not to think too much go out and relax with friends to take your mind off things.
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