A
male
age
30-35,
*reedom76
writes:Hello. I am in a somewhat complicated situation with this girl. We started off as friends, and eventually we grew closer and closer, but just as friends. A few months later, she told me that she liked me and I went along and said I liked her too. Then we'd spend time together, flirt together, hold hands, go places, and the like. A few months later, she kissed me (like a short peck). Then she ignored me for a week, and later told me that she "didn't feel the spark." On the other hand, I had never kissed anyone before so it wasn't expected to be so good either. She also said that she didn't want to be the "teacher" and me the "shy guy," and that she didn't like "stringing me along." And she told me to give her "space," which I did to some extent. Since then, we went on being just friends, and time passed (two months) and we became best friends again. Problem is that I never got over her, and I still like her. My friends told me to ignore her for a while, and after two days she started going crazy, asking everyone where I went (I was avoiding her). After a week I talked to her again. At first she was angry, but then I explained how I was busy (which I was). Then she told me how she missed me, and how she felt anxious, and how I thought she wanted some "space," and she said that that was what she wanted but she got lonely. And then we started flirting with each other again, and everything was like what it was before we kissed several months earlier. But she never said she liked me. However, she did ask me what I would do if she told me she liked me again. The next day I talked to her again, but with no flirting or anything, as if everything was back to after we kissed. I'd love to get her as my gf... I just don't know how. Long story, isn't it? And missing some pieces... But it's basically what happened. I do like her, but does she like me? When I'm not around she wants me around a lot, but when I'm with her she questions why I follow her a lot.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (30 May 2012):
 You both need to be honest with each other and stop all these silly games. This is really not a long story you just need to communicate better. It is clear you like her as more than a friend, I am unsure about how she feels right now, but you need to do the right thing and be honest with her. You know if you don't tell her and try to remain friends it will be really hard for you. At the end of the day a friendship with this girl is never going to work if you have feelings for her, so you need to gain some confidence and tell her that.
It sounds to me like she does like you but she is just confused about what she wants. Maybe she feels you are to quiet or shy for her. Maybe you need to gain more confidence in yourself. Talk to her and be honest with her. Stop dragging it out because you are only hurting yourself, ignoring her is childish and is not going to achieve anything you just need to be honest with her.
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