A
male
age
26-29,
*arrendsmit
writes: I was with this girl for 2 years, and when we were together she told me that she loved me and wanted a life with me. about a month ago she turned around one day and told me she has been unhappy with me for months and broke things off. since then she has been posting horrible things about me on Facebook and all over her social media, so my question is if she is the one who left me why is she lashing out and treating me like crap?
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reader, anonymous, writes (16 April 2019): That's because she doesn't want you; and doesn't want anybody else to have you either!
She's spreading the word and rumors about you; and everyone and anyone female even remotely interested in you, will avoid you. It's also a head-game to be ever-present on your mind; and to keep you reeling with paranoia about what she'll do next. She wants you to look like the jerk; not herself, for dumping you. Some girls gravitate to the poor guy who got dumped! She's "peeing" on you to mark her territory! She knows girls go for recently-dumped guys; because they're sensitive and vulnerable.
She's a bad-egg! There were red-flags you were overlooking about her toxic-personality; because you thought she loved you. Well, now she feels done with you; but she doesn't want you to get a new girlfriend right-away. She doesn't want to deal with the jealousy she will feel; if there is some nice pretty girl who has always had an eye on you, and decides to check you out.
Careful not to rebound. It will mess you up more than anything she's doing! You'll also unintentionally hurt feelings; because rebound-feelings are temporary. Rebound-feelings fool you into thinking you really like somebody; e only to immediately dump them when your feelings change.
Here's the clincher! She will even try to get you back, trust me. She may be checking-out some guy, and if it doesn't work-out; suddenly she wants to make-up! BUT DON'T!
Don't get played like that!
Block her on your social media accounts, and on your phone. Even if you are tempted, you have to stop reading her posts; and stalking her on social media. It will only upset you, and you will become addicted to stalking her to see what she's posting about you.
Ghost her! When she can't see you, and if you can't see her; she can't hurt you. Guard your heart and you feelings; so you won't get angry. You need time to get-over her.
You have to let-go now. If you keep reading her messages or posts, she will keep your mind spinning. You have to man-up and deal with this like an adult. You have to go completely no contact. Avoid mutual-friends. Block contacts you have that she shares. She needs a time-out and a blackout. You do too.
A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (16 April 2019):
Why?
Who knows? Maybe she feels she need to justify dumping you. Maybe she wants attention and maybe she wants YOU to be the "bad" guy in the break up scenario.
WHO knows?
Why are you still following her in social media? Why not just BLOCK, UNFRIEND, DELETE etc.? Go absolutely no contact with her and work on moving on.
You can't control what she says, does or feel - ONLY how YOU react to it.
So don't feel her drama-llama-cravings and JUST CUT her off.
Stop wasting your time on how or why... it's irrelevant as you two are OVER.
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