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She ended our 3 year relationship because of an old crush, who won't even go out with a girl!

Tagged as: Cheating, Gay relationships, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (13 September 2009) 1 Answers - (Newest, 14 September 2009)
A female United States age 36-40, anonymous writes:

I'm 21, have been dating my girl best friend who is bisexual for almost 3 years. I'm in love with her. She always seems to be very good and loyal to me. All of the sudden, she told me that she still likes this one girl whom she had a crush on in 8th grade. I found out that she and this girl were drinkign together with some friends, this girl got drunk and kissed her, then she cannot stop thinking about this girl. Even though she knows that this girl will never go out with a girl, she still decides to end our relationship while she was still confused whether it's a moment thing or she really likes this girl. I'm angry and devastated. I really dont know what to do. I really love her and want to be with her for a long time. i feel that she still likes me, even if it's not as much like before. What should I do? Everyone told me that I should move on because it's obvious that i'm going to suffer if she comes back to me. But i still cannot let her go.

View related questions: best friend, crush, drunk, move on

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A female reader, Lola1 Canada +, writes (14 September 2009):

Lola1 agony auntI feel for you, but your friends are right. She obviously has some things to work out and needs space.

When you are 18 - 21, a three year relationship is an eternity. However, it is unlikely that these relationships last. Even those who marry their teenage loves usually end up relatively unhappy and wondering what they've missed.

If it helps you while healing, think about how things would be if she came back. Would you feel comfortable when she goes out with the "girls"? Would you feel jealous and insecure about new female friends that enter her life? Isn't the best part of your relationship behind you now?

You owe it to yourself to take the necessary steps to move on with your life.

In a few years (if not a few months), this will seem like child's play.

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