A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:hey every1 i posted a question last month abt a cheating girlfriend whom i was meant to propose to on d 20th of this month on her 21st birthday! she cheated she says she made a mistake i believe her but g part of me is stl very angry at her! normally when its her birthday i get very creative n cum up wt great ideas bt dis year i cnt thnk of 1. is it because this year she cheated on me? what should i do for her for her 21st birthday? please help me cause its a once in a lyf time occation!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 May 2009): i thave read your previous postings. i personally think you have been a fool to just accept all her lies for the years you both have been together ( sorry, i am being harsh but i am trying to be honest).
your inability to get her a "perfect present" is because you know deep down that you two are not perfect together. you still have trust issues and need time to work through. you may say that you have accepted her les and forgiven her but your head and heart are telling you otherwise. pehaps you are trying too hard, trying too hard to fix something that was long broken.
i think your subconcious is telling you that she is not the one. but i think you will only realise this much later on in your life. so much invested in her i'm hoping ( as i said previously) that she is worth it.
A
male
reader, GrimmReality  +, writes (11 May 2009):
 why don't you give yourself a present and leave her....
Dude,
wrong lane changes are mistakes.
Cheating is a conscious decision. She doesn't love you if she cheated, NO EXCUSE EVER!
So with that, you should be getting a new girlfriend. You only know about once, there could be others she spread her legs for.
Dump her and be glad she will be someone elses problem
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 May 2009): Lack of creativity can be related to heartbreak, yes. However, some people make a living off of being creative about their heartbreak and pain. The problem here is, a gift is more the providence of joyous inspiration, and not the sadness and betrayal you still feel.
You need to decide whether to forgive her or not. If you still harbor anger for her, that is not forgiveness. As to what to get her. You know your girl best.
Perhaps you can get her a birthstone necklace, or even better, a weekend retreat with you to some exotic locale. Re-spark what was lost, so to speak.
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