A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:hi there me and girlfriend have been together for 6 months now. it is great but everytime we have sex she has pains in her vagina. we can only do missionary and i was wondering if i am doing anything wrong or am i trying to rush to fast and shud wait longer for positions. i have also ran out of oral things to spice up before sex. help me please
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reader, anonymous, writes (4 April 2011): Okay, so sometimes it hurts when my boyfriend and I have sex. But if I adjust my pelvis, then I'm fine. Sometimes the angle at which he enters me is what hurts.
But then I've seen this one show where, on one episode, these couples were having pain during sex. This one sex therapist told the guy to always have foreplay with the girl, so it'd help her body be ready for a penis to enter her vagina. And not only with oral, but she put an emphasis on fingering, to finger the upper wall (the wall closest to her navel) inside her vagina and press up on it while you finger it, massaging it basically. She said that this little massage would loosen up the walls of the vagina so that she could have more pleasurable sex. Try that and see if it works. Take your time, don't rush it.
Hope this helped!
A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (4 April 2011):
 Oral things? You ran out? You can't really "run out" of oral sex. Unless she ran out of orgasms you can still continue to deliver through oral sex. As for the intercourse, are you sure your girlfriend is wet when you have sex? Check with your finger. If it is wet you will know, if you can't feel any moisture down there, or only a little, it is not enough. Some women have difficulty getting wet enough, or sometimes the body doesn't do what you want it to and the woman doesn't get wet enough. If that is the case you should buy lubricant. To get a woman wet you need to use foreplay. If you take too little time, or use too long time, she could get dry again. It could be that you enter her too quickly. Take it slooooooow. Let her be in charge by listening to her, focus on her, ask her to tell you if you are going to slow or too fast. What does she complain about if you try other positions? Does it hurt when you enter, does it hurt after you have had sex for a while? The most common reason for pain is too much friction. That means she isn't wet enough, and buying lubricant will fix your problem. The other option is that you are well endowed (large penis), or curved in a certain way that hits certain spots inside of her, making it uncomfortable. For example if you are too long for her you will hit her cervix too hard. Perhaps you go in too deep. It is quite common, even with average or small penises, that certain positions just don't work. You need to dare to try out new things to figure out what works and what doesn't. You could for example look at positions from books at the library, or online, and test them out with clothes on to get used to them and see how they would feel. Then test out the ones you liked best afterwards when you have sex. Good foreplay things besides oral sex: kissing, touching, massages, dirty looks, watch a porn together, fingering, just lay close and rub up against each other, have a shower together, use blindfolds on each other and explore each others bodies without being able to look, play role play games like S/M (just a light version for fun, you don't need handcuffs or a whip or anything) and so on. The options are endless. Just ENJOY each other, and let things come naturally. If you don't end up having intercourse let it be OK. You don't always have to go all the way you know, that only builds up pressure. So talk about it being OK to not have intercourse every time you have sex.
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