A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:hello(:I'm 15 years old and have been talking to a guy for over a year. He made it "official" a week ago. We tried having sex but it hurt way too much i could not handle the pain. I felt really bad because i told him i was ready. But i just wanna know what i can do to prepare my vagina a little more. Your answers are very much appreciated(:[Mod note: Standard capitalization is very much appreciated, your question was edited for readability.]
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female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (27 October 2009):
 I think your body is telling you it's not ready for sex yet. I wish I could get across to you how backwards your statement here is: "I felt really bad because I told him is was ready." YOU shouldn't be feeling bad about not being ready. HE should be feeling bad because he's got you trying to do something you clearly aren't ready for. And before you say, "you don't understand", remember that I was a teenage girl with very similar pressures. Oh yes I do understand. And from my advantage of years and experience and hindsight, you are trying too hard to do something that you just aren't ready for. Wait. Please. It will be worth it in the long run, I promise you.
Tell us about this guy a little bit, that he has no idea how to make it not be painful. He doesn't sound too smart.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 October 2009): First of all, you've been 'talking to' a guy for a year but you're only just now being "official" but you're already having sex after a week? I strongly suggest you consider the possible consequences of this, including a high potential for heartbreak. Was he your first? How old is he? Did you use protection?
I ask all these things because it's important when having sex that before you even focus on how to do it/how it feels that you think about the action itself. What if you get pregnant or an STD, etc.?
Don't feel bad, if you weren't ready you weren't ready, it's not your fault, but I think you should take that as a sign that maybe you should wait a bit for sex. More foreplay will help you get ready for sex, and practicing other things can make your vagina more used to that type of thing.
Please remember to be safe and use protection. Also, don't just do it because he wants to, make sure you're actually ready and want to with him. Otherwise, I promise you'll end up hurt, and no one here wants you to have to come here posting about how hurt you are after it's all said and done. Please be careful.
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