A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My problem is to do with SEX. I lost my virginity when I was 18 with a long-term boyfriend (who was also a virgin). It was painful, more so than I expected, but I didn't bleed. The second time was also just as painful, and I did bleed. We stayed together for about nine months after this, and the sex was still painful, to the point where I was scared and just stopped wanting to do it. After a while, we broke up (not relating to the sex), and have both moved on.So, now I'm in a long term relationship with my current boyfriend who I love A LOT, but I'm still scared to have sex. I love him a lot, and he's not pressuring me, but I'm scared it's going to affect us if I don't make love with him. So I guess my question is this: Why was sex so painful for me? Basically, it felt like there wasn't enough room inside me. Every time my ex thrusted, it really hurt me. We tried different positions, for example, with me on top to try to alleviate the pressure, but it just didn't help. Is it possible that he was just too big for me, or that he was doing it wrong? Is there something wrong inside of me? I know the pain isn't coming from the breaking of my hymen or anything like that... It is up, inside me.At the time, I told my ex boyfriend about this and he never really said or did anything about it (you can see why we broke up ___), and I haven't told my current boyfriend about it. I just want this problem to go away so we can be happy.Thanks in advance.
View related questions:
broke up, hymen, lost my virginity, my ex Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (21 January 2007): i think every thing may done on wrong way will lead to bad result; any way there are possibilty to learn some thing about this from books ,vedios......
in some cases the wrong way and specialy as mentioned before it was the first time for the both ;so i think it is necessary to explain in details the frist time, may this will lead to find the suitable solution.
best regard;
ady
A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 January 2007): There could be lots of reasons to why it hurts. For example you may of been tensing and not relaxing. If you speak to your current boyfriend and explain to him i'm sure he will understand and take his time with you.
It could be that yes he was too big but as time goes on it should come less painfull.
If it doesnt and you really need to put your mind at rest you could always go and speak to a nurse.
Good luck
XXxXX
...............................
A
female
reader, aphexinfinite +, writes (18 January 2007):
 youre relationship shouldnt falter because of no sexual preference (tho depending on the guy). my best advice may be to go see youre doctor about it, seems their may be a technical problem that isnt something to worry about that may need dealing with i wouldnt worry too much but i would go see my gp i know its embaressing but its better to deal with it than leaving it and it just becoming a worse situation, it could be a possibilitie that he was to big for you, but if it were me ide grit my teeth and go see my gp encase it was something to do with me inside..hopes this helps xxxx A
...............................
|
