A
female
age
41-50,
*raviesagemini
writes:In a way I would like to make things work out between my ex boyfriend and I. I found out I was pregnant with his child at 14 1/2 weeks, after we were no longer together. It was always an on and off relationship so I did not expect him to have such a negative reaction. I had been diagnosed with a cyst in the brain and was told I needed to see a Neurosurgeon ASAP. The doctor I was being referred to was in Phoenix which is a 4 hour drive for me one way. I figured I'd go back home and get this taken care of in Chicago where all my immediate family resides. I had been told that all the nausea and vomitting I had were symptoms of the cyst that I had. I had MRI and CT Scans done the neurosurgeon was going to continue further testing but it was between these exams that I found out I was pregnant. I stopped all further exams as the Dr. said it wouldn't be safe for the unborn baby and I should just continue treatment once I gave birth. Within two days of finding out I was pregnant I had heavy bleeding. If I wouldn't have known I was pregnant I would of thought this was my period. It didnt seem normal to me so I went to the hospital in which the dr. explained I have a high risk pregnancy. For the first time after they did the ultrasound and heard my unborns baby's heartbeat I felt an unreal sensation. I want this baby. Immediately after finding out I called my ex and told him I had just found out I was pregnant and it was his child. He was in disbelief and said he would be there for the child I told him I would be going to the dr. that following day to ensure the baby was not hurt by the prior MRI and CT scans that I had done as I was concerned this could have hurt him. He asked me to call him after the dr.s appt. to keep him postd. I had called him twice and he didn't answer. He never called back. I returned back to Douglas, AZ where we are both stationed to find out he was no longer here as had been detailed in Tucson, AZ wich is 2 hours away. The little phone contact that I've had with him has been extremely negative. He said that because he has 3 girls from his prior relationship I was not going to take from them to give to this one. I had to remind him this one is also his blood. He has contacted me only to offer to pay for an abortion, which to me is out of the question. When I declined he said that's not his child anyways. To make it worst we both work together. He's 37 Im 33 and this would be my first child. Even if we don't ever make things work out between us I was hoping he would be around for our child. Im pretty much by myself as all my friends and family reside in Chicago and due to the work I transferred out to a Border town in the middle of nowhere Douglas, AZ. I would go back home but I need the medical insurance and employment now more than ever. I have not seen my ex as he was reassigned in Tucson, AZ until the end of September so everything has been said over the phone and throgh texting. Im wondering if once he sees me in person and sees the size of my stomache it will then hit him and he will realize what he is doing is wrong.
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female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (14 August 2009):
 I think you had best start planning on raising this child on your own. By law he will have to pay child support but it doesn't force him to have anything else to do with the child. If you don't expect any more from him then you won't be disappointed when you don't get it. Good luck and take good care of yourself.
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