A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:i have kids from my previous marriage and the kids live wit dad. im now in a love triangle and pregnant. he lives with his first love about 60 km in the next town. the other lady is awre of my relationship with her partner. he will call her to for me to just say hi to her. the problem is that im having a very difficult pregnancy and dont see him as often as id like due to his work commitments. i depend on him to ay for my room and food. i feel the money is small. i used to sell perfumes before i met him tell i got pregnant. i cnt take the different smell anymore. i made enough that time. i somehow feel the love is fading even though he kees communication open. i dont get as much sex either. but i love him as he is a kind person. will it be wise to take a break from him?
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female
reader, deirdre  +, writes (5 June 2015):
Is this kind of relationship the norm where you are from? Are you happy with this arrangement? Would you like a husband who only has you and who isnt cheating on you? Do you think that you dont deserve better? Please think about these important issues.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 June 2015): You need to get your priorities in order.
Instead of worrying that you don't get enough sex from the guy who is cheating on his live-in girlfriend with you, your first and only concern should be doing what's best for the baby you are about to have and are incapable of supporting on your own.
Would his girlfriend be willing to take his mistress's child into their home? If not, would he be willing to consent to an adoption? Or perhaps your first baby daddy might be willing to raise his children's half-sibling.
Given your present circumstances and prior history, any of the above scenarios would be much better for the child than him/her remaining with you. I'd also suggest you request a tubal ligation when you deliver this baby.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 June 2015): Your situation is unusual but not impossible.Do your other children know that your expecting another baby? It must awaken some mixed feelings in you.Whilst the current boyfriend is too busy to see you, you are being forced to take stock of your life. As you are a kept woman you are in no position to call the shots.What if he just decides to take a break from paying the bills,then you and your unborn child will be out on the streets a short month later,presumably with nowhere to go.Bringing a new life into the world is an important one,but now is the time to think of anyway that you can reasonably bring money into the home.If the smell of perfume makes you sick or your pregnancy makes it difficult, try to learn to crochet or knit or sew so that you can dress the baby and maybe sell baby clothes.Look for support groups and become as self reliant as possible as this will stand you in good stead for the future and try not to worry about sex or the love triangle as you have already done the deed and there is no guarantee that this arrangement will be viable in the long term.Look after yourself and your child with the best spirit you can muster. In an ideal world his wife would arrive with congratulations, flowers and baby clothes but there is no guarantee that this would be the case.
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