| A
male
,
anonymous
writes: hey im 16 and im going to see a film with this girl i like. Im not nervous or anything because i know we both fancy each other. I got my friend to ask her what she wants from me and where our friendship is going and she said she wants a realationship which is fine by me. However there is one thing i don't like about her... she is 16 and she smokes. I think she has smoked for a few years now but how do i tell her i don't want her to smoke and ask her to stop without upseting her or anything. I obviously don't expect her to stop right away because it is hard (i have never smoked) but how can i help her stop. Please help.
View related questions:
smokes Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Wendyg  +, writes (3 July 2006):
 Somebody that smokes will only stop because they want to, not because someone else tells them to. If shes not ready to give up you will have to accept thats shes a smoker. If you really dont like it then you may have to decide not to date her. YOu either accept it or you dont, she wont just give up because you think its a good idea, shes got to want to do it.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 July 2006): if you dont like her smoking (which i totally understand) dont get involved with her. be her friend but dont actually be g/f and b/f, just be mates. stop the relationship before it gets too serious. because what if she doesn't want to stop smoking? then where will you be? think about how much you dont want her to smoke and would it matter THAT much to you if she didnt stop? if it does then dont be with her. i know i wouldnt want a b/f who smokes!
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 July 2006): You have no right to tell her to stop smoking.
When you know each other better, you could suggest it, and encourage her, but right now at these early stages of a relationship you have to choose whether or not you want to go out with a smoker or not.
...............................
|
