A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: Hi,At last I hope I found someone to help us. My husband and I have had proper good sex for four years. Then we lived far from each other cause he left to work in another country. We only met again seven months later. We were together for one month and the sex was good. We now have one year old baby. Since I got pregnant, we haven't had sex. I thought it was ok as we didn't get to see each other from when I was one month pregnant till our baby was a year old. Now, he can't get an errection. After a few tries, he got fustrated and cried and gave up trying. I wonder what is happening. He says he feels the urge but after the preliminaries, we can't get any futher. I'm fustrated; Can someone tell me what could possibly be the problem? what can we do? Thanks very much, I look foward to reading your reply.
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male
reader, ChiRaven +, writes (4 April 2007):
There are two general ways this can happen: physical problems and psychological problems.
The physical problems mostly have to do with blood circulation or some kind of trauma to the genital region. Since you didn't mention him having been hit down there or anything like that, if it's physical I think we can point to circulatory problems as the most likely cause. If that's the case, the best thing to do is see a doctor, preferably a specialist in urology, who can be sure what's going on. And these things are VERY treatable these days. Viagra, you know. Or other things. One thing to watch for ... does he get a "bladder erection" in the morning when he first wakes up after drinking a lot of fluid the night before? If he gets stiff until he urinates, that will help the doctor isolate the problem, and make it more likely that it is not physical.
Oh, in a few cases the physical causes are due to low hormone levels, but that is VERY rare in young men.
Which leads to the psychological problems. This is the fallback in case the doctor doesn't find anything physical wrong. There can be a lot of reasons for them, but once again professional help can solve these problems in most cases. It could be related to how he really feels about parenthood ... maybe even so deep down that even HE is not aware of it. Or it could be one of any number of other things. A qualified professional is once again the way to go. And while working with the counselor don't be surprised if you end up with Viagra as part of your routine too.
Great stuff, that Viagra.
One caveat here. I am NOT a qualified medical or psychological professional. As an ordinary person, I recommend that you consult someone who IS qualified to help you with this problem. Please don't let it build up into something that can really hurt the two of you and your life together.
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