| A
male
,
*ayonarashark
writes: Hi, I'm recently 15. There's this girl I've known for 3 years now, and for most of that time I've fancied her. I never did anything about it because I was in a long-term relationship which lasted 2 1/2 years. 3 months ago we broke up for various reasons, but now this girl I like has got her 1st bf (she's also his 1st gf). I still like her, and she says she likes me.I haven't asked her to break up with her bf coz I don't think that would be fair at all. I really don't know what to do. My last breakup still hurts, but I really like this girl and I dont't know what to do, or if I should do anything at all. Help would be much appreciated, cheers.
View related questions:
broke up Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, sayonarashark +, writes (16 July 2006):
sayonarashark is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks for you're help. i've decided you're right, i have to get over my last gf first. i told her how i feel, she said this:
"look, david, i know you like me, but i'm going out with alfie. My only glitch is i like you to, but nothing's going to happen until me and alfie brake up, if you want to wait up, that's your choice"
cheers people, really appreciate the help
A
female
reader, lucee +, writes (16 July 2006):
first of all you need to get over you ex-girlfriend. this other girl you like may feel you only want her as you are on the rebound. tell her you like her, make it clear, so she can't stay 'oh i didn't know'. after you have made it clear back off, give her time. if she does like you then the ball is in her court to do something about it.
...............................
A
female
reader, Bev Conolly  +, writes (16 July 2006):
 Well, you can't "ask" someone to break up with their boyfriend or girlfriend. That's a decision that has to come about organically, between the two people involved.
That said, if she's happy in the relationship she's in, I wonder why she'd be telling you that she likes you too. That doesn't seem very kind to her boyfriend. Or very honest.
My thoughts about a person who'd still sniff around for attention from others, even when that person is in a relationship, is that you should proceed very cautiously. If she'd cast around for male attention from you while she's with her current-boyfriend then there's a good chance she'd do the same thing if she was with you. Give that some consideration.
There are certain unspoken rules of dating, and one of those is that you shouldn't try to steal the affections of someone in a relationship, no matter how much they may say they don't like the one they're in.
You can indicate possible interest by saying something like "I'd love to go out with you if you were single", but the choice of what to do next belongs with her.
However, if you're still smarting over your last breakup, it's probably not a good time for any of this. You need to give yourself time to get over that hurt, and since the object of your affections is with someone else anyway, it seems the best advice to you right now is: do nothing to get into another relationship whilst you're still hurting from the last one.
...............................
|
