A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hey Dear Cupid,I am confused and conflicted. I am in a long term relationship and have developed feelings for a work colleague. This is my first crush in a long time and this colleague is definitely my type, introverted, intelligent and beautiful! There are other reasons as to why a relationship could work and a real possibility for long term partnership.I ask questions like "what if I was meant to meet her" and "how do I know if I have out grown my relationship".I have suspicions she is interested in me as well without conclusive proof. I don't want to say anything out of respect to my partner and her relationship. I can only presume she could be in the same predicament. I never thought I would be put in a position such as this. I have been loyal to all my partners but this feels different.So please help, I do not know where I go from here.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 August 2018): I'm kinda in the same situation, so I think you should follow your heart and let her know how you feel by showing some signals and see how she responds.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (31 July 2018): Thanks janniepeg. It seems I have some thinking to do.
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A
female
reader, janniepeg +, writes (29 July 2018):
 I think you have outgrown your relationship, or you just don't believe in long term relationships. People who are committed to the right person would not entertain thoughts of other people. They would be able to act professional and courteous at work. You are merely infatuated with your coworker. The decision to have a relationship is a joint one. It's too much wishful thinking to assume a relationship would work without even dating. Some people just enjoy mutual crushes. It makes you feel alive, attractive. It gives you a reason to wake up in the morning. A lot of crushes remain secret but people have benefited from not saying anything, especially in the workplace. I don't think your crush means you should be with that coworker. It means your current relationship does not serve you anymore good.
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