A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I would like concrete advice on the difference between being needy and needing someone. How do you convey needs without coming across needy?Please give examples. Thanks! Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (26 March 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for all the answers. I have never actually been accused of being needy. I just have a difficult time expressing real needs so by the time I actually express them there is a panicky feeling that I will be rejected... which I assume then is neediness.
I am very independent. I can be alone or together and in general I do not think I am needy. I can do everything myself if I have to... in fact the biggest problem is letting someone else actually meet any needs. But when I do express one and it fails to be met... that hurts a lot.
So I know there is a problem... lol. So I am trying to understand the difference... because its a rather difficult concept to get the right balance.
A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (25 March 2010):
 Needing someone is like wanting a b/f or g/f ,like wanting someone to complement your weakness and strength in a partnership.You have a need .
Being needy means wanting constant attentions, affections and reassurance from the other person to an excessive degree.
By constantly calling or texting them and relying on them 100% for you to get through the day and for all your needs and happiness.
Needy and clingy is the same. It is a turn off.
If you think you have a need , you should let him know but you should try to solve them by yourself first and only asked for his help if you are unable to over come it.
You should not run to him whenever you are faced with problems in life. Deal with it yourself .If you run to him with every major and minor problems , then you would appear to be needy to him.
If your life is full of problems ,then you will be come a needy person and your prospective b/f will scoot as fast as their legs can carry them.
If you tell your prospective b/f, that you need a big house,condo , big car then that is not your needs but your wants.
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