A
male
age
41-50,
*eilAbes
writes:About 2 weeks agop I checked my wifes email as had suspisions, on it in her deleted folder I found emails from facebook from a guy we both know that were increadibly distasteful, so I managed to log into her facebook accound where I found messages both in her sent items and inbox from this guy describing all the things they want to do to each other including 1 about meeting up for a dirty weekend.When I questioned her she claimed it was all innocent and my fault as I do not pay her enough attention.What do I do please help
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (16 December 2010): I've been married for 18 years and had the Same thing happen to me. I found out nov 7 2010, 2 days before her birthday, on a Sunday right after sex & right before church? Wth! She was laying next to me texting sombody and had gotten a picture text from our daughter she was so exited about the picture she forgot to switch screens and I sAw the sext she had sent her buddy, talking about having him do oral sex on her and feeling comfortable about him doing it, she don't even like me to dothat to her!! Well as you can imagine sh** hit the fan!! I could not belive she would do this to me after so many years together? Then she had the nerve to try and say it was forwarded to her that she did not send it to anybody but it was in her sent files. We then hot ready for church and when we arrived she was in tears!! The pastors wife pulled her to the aide and asked her what was wrong and it all came out, they told her to come clean about the whole thing and she admitted to having an affair with an old highschool friend, whom I knew well. This **ck would come over every once and a while for BBQ or partys, all because I trusted her. She claimed that it only happend once and she could not go through it all the way cause she didn't feel right so she left in the middle of the act, but we all know that having a little liquor in your system and some partying makes a good state of mind for a sexual encounter. She continued to say that they never did it again after the first time and that it was only explicit sexting after the first time they had sex together which was 3 years ago. It may sound crazy but I forgave her that day, after going crazy and wanting to die, I asked my lord why? And What should I do? After all the years we shared together as husband and wife I did what was best in gods eyes, I forgave her for her mistake. I know not many men would, it's even biblical I have every right to divorce, but I chose to keep my marrige and my family we have 4 children all teens, but we all make mistakes I've had a few of my own, not like this of course but all said ,I'm still living day by day with this and it seems like I won't ever get over it any time soon. But with god and prayer I know we will get over this only god can remove pain like this it's made us stronger relationship wise. Gods grace can move mountains, I hope that your relations with your partner can be healed and my story can give you insparation to make it work! God bless !!
A brother in the LORD , Torrance ca.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 December 2010): Your fault? NO WAY JOSE !!!!! If things are not good enough for her and that is what she does to feel good about herself,then she should have mentioned it or ended your marriage first. She choose to cheat because she knows this guy is not offering anything more than use of her body in exchange for whatever she wants to hear. You have caught her red handed,do not take her bullshit. She`s unfaithful,selfish and a crap wife. Blaming you is her way of portraying herself as the victim. She knows right from wrong. If you are apologetic,she will simply carry on and hide it better. You have now learned she is not the woman you believed she was.
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A
male
reader, Mossberg500  +, writes (14 December 2010):
I would break up with her.. If you ddont give her enough attention, she should tlk to you about it but she has no right to cheat on you
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