A
male
age
51-59,
*ohnR6931
writes:Hi,I am a male, 51, married with 2 children (early teens). I am a late developer sexually (I have a tumor of the pituitary gland which slowed me down for years - it was not discovered until I was early 30's although it had been there for many years quietly suppressing me ). I Missed load of 'action' when I was young and would like to try things now the kids are becoming more independent.That is the background - not my question though.So now I feel I really understand my sexual feelings and desires. My big problem is the incompatibility with my wife who is about 4-5 years older and does not possess the same burning desire for love making (she will do it but not kiss during the act - which I find weird). Anyway getting to the point...I recently finally shaved my pubes off, just for the hell of it - it felt different and fun and gave me a little buzz even, cost it was different. My wife who does not look at or touch my genital very often finally saw what I had done and said what I had done "was weird". I wanted her to do the same - just to do something different - she won't as she has done in the past with a previous boyfriend (so considers it ticked off the list).Am I weird? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (29 November 2011):
 nope not weird at all.. my 38 yr old boyfriend was totally shaved when we met... I don't like him totally shaved because he is slim of build and looks too childlike to me so he's grown a bit back and now just trims extensively...
I myself am totally waxed because we both prefer mine that way and there is no way I look 12 after 2 children….(and I’m 51) so her not wanting it for her is one thing but I can see her being a bit adventurous and indulging you.
I too am concerned that she does not kiss you during sex…. Do you kiss at other times? Do you cuddle? Are you affectionate with each other?
are there other problems that the sex part are just the tip of the iceberg to?
A
female
reader, AngelEyes9 +, writes (28 November 2011):
Hi JohnR6931,
No, you are not weird. Actually almost every boyfriend I have had, including my ex-husband and my current husband, have shaved their pubes at least once; one brave guy liked it when I shaved his for him. These men were average Joes ranging in profession from a construction worker, to a business man, to a teacher, to a bartender, to a Soldier. They all thought it felt sexy until it started itching when the hair grew back.
I think your wife may be intimidated and overwhelmed by your new sexuality and sex drive, especially if she is experiencing menopause. Maybe if you increase the romance she will respond more positively to love making. Kiss her during love making. Show her and tell her that you desire her and that you are not just using her to get off. You said she “does not possess the same burning desire for love making”. Well, why should she? When was the last time you tried to sweep her off her feet? A women’s desire for love making starts emotionally, not physically.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 November 2011): Not weird. I was talking today to my BF how sad it is to hear so many couples lose the 'spark' in their sex life. Shaving pubic hair would be a way of spicing up things and wouldn't be an ends to said marriage.
I would hope as I reach those years; my BF aka Hubby and I would still be loving and enjoying one another so intimately that we will still be taking outer city drives to park somewhere, baby oil one another up and give the other full body massages with our bodies and what not.
Totally not weird. Just a man willing to be proactive and take charge to invite back in some fun, spice, spark into their sex life.
WAY TO GO! I wouldn't give up. I would ask wife questions about dreams, fantasies, offer her foot massages and leg rubs while watching TV. To slowly inginte cold embers. ;)
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A
female
reader, Starlights +, writes (28 November 2011):
 I dont think you are weird.
I wonder why your wife doesnt kiss you during sex... does she enjoy being kissed aside from during sex?
maybe she doesnt find it passionate enough, you cant know until you ask her why she does not like it? :)
as for her preferences its not weird for anyone to shave, if she is not comfortable doing it on herself there is not much you can do to force her.
Hope this helps!
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