A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I am 25 yrs old my boyfriend of 7 years just turned 24 and our sex life sucks we don't have one he sleeps all.day and plays video games all night we don't sleep together anymore when I'm in the mood he tells me I'm a freak to leave him alone he rarely goes out so I know he's not cheating but damn I have needs I'm still young what should I do? I love him but I need love too... :( #SexuallyFrustrated
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 December 2012): We have 3 kids together he was my first everything :/ he just started working yesterday but only because I begged my mom to give him a job because he just wouldn't even try looking for one... but thank you to all of you for your great advice I'm going to leave him I'm not happy with him
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (11 December 2012):
 If he makes no effort, then I see no choice.
If he sleeps all day and plays games all night when does he work or go to school?
if he doesn't who is supporting him? If it's you... well then honey you have an albatross around your neck that you need to get rid of.
I know you don't want to think about this... I know you think that you can fix him. You can't. You can only be responsible for yourself. And part of that means that you may have to make the difficult decision to leave comfortable and easy (with a known partner) and be alone for a bit and then find a new partner.
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A
female
reader, Memerlyn +, writes (11 December 2012):
Dearest, you've been together with this person for a long while to where you both should know each other by now. things change but the friendship should only get stronger, the bond should feel weathered. The sex does get comfortertable and less as years go by, some more faster than others, but my concern with your relationship is the name calling and his motivation for survival. I hope you aren't being his mother as well. Sit down and think about what is going on, how long, and if he is participating in this relatioinship as he should in other areas. You kinda have an idea of his average particpation, has it become worse? Sometimes love is tough, I am not thinking of his welfare, I am thinking of yours as well. If he is slacking off, you need to have a calm discussion of what is going on in his head and heart about everything. A relationship is work it is more than fourty hours a week. sit calmly, do not let his insults, sarcasm, if any get you angry. He needs to have respect for you has a human being and above all his partner. If you are living together and he is not going to give you it, ask him when you can sit down and discuss your concerns, fears, ect., Keep it within the next few hours or days, plan for it, do not let things calm down and ignore what has been going on. This is your life your relationship as well as his, if he cares he will be able to listen calmly and with love because he cares for you. Feel free to share this post to let him know that this is not the average in making a relationship feel secure. And remember dear, you can not change him, it has to be him and what he finds worthy of change for. If he doesn't he may not value your lives together as one as much as you do. I only wish you the best, I know its hard, but you need your needs met as well as his.
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A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (10 December 2012):
 I think you already know what you have to do. He has some serious issues he needs to work out and doesn't seem willing to do so. If he is unwilling to seek help, you need to cut him loose. Maybe that will be the kick in the ass he needs to get help, maybe not. But you're too young to waste your time trying to sort out his life.
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A
male
reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (10 December 2012):
 I'm no shrink but it sure sounds like he's depressed (maybe clinically. Get him to see a doctor. Low T?For some clown that's NOT a doctor, I seem top have found two possibles.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 December 2012): He needs a shock to his system to straighten out his life. Example, you leaving him.
Its not about the sex, its about the rest of the relationship. How can it be satisfying when there is little substance to it?
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (10 December 2012):
 I assume you two live together?
So he doesn't work? all he does is sleep and play video games and then of course berate you?
Why are you still with him? WHAT are you getting out of that relationship? What is about him that you love? The guy as he is NOW? No when you first dated. But that guy who sleeps all day and play video games all night.. what is so lovely about him?
Seems to me he is still stuck in his teens and you have grown up.
If you are even thinking of cheating (even if you wouldn't do it) doesn't that give you a clue that there is a HUGE disconnect in the relationship?
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A
male
reader, Yos  +, writes (10 December 2012):
 It sounds like he's depressed, and addicted to video games. That will make him moody, aggressive, and uninterested in you. Tackle his depression and addiction and your relationship will improve.
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