A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Please help me! I'm only 16 and my parents might send me to a home!I can't stand my mom...she drives me nuts and I can't even stand to be AROUND her! She just annoys the hell out of me and now she wants to send me to a home because she "can't deal with me anymore" and that she "doesn't deserve" what I'm doing.I skipped this one class for about 2 weeks and when I had stopped-the school called my mom and she got all pissed off and flipped like she always does. Now when we got to the school she kept complaining "why do you do this to me?" and things like that and then she said "if you do anything like this again I will send your ass to a home!" The thing is-I skipped this one class(not the same class, a class I skipped ONCE the ENTIRE year) and I got sent to the office and now he's going to call my mom! I'm so terrified! I know it was my own fault and should only blame myself-but I'm really scared and need help! Truth is-I WANT to go to a home to get away from her but I don't want to leave all my friends and my boyfriend that I had fallen in love with! Someone please please help me! Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 February 2007): Okay, here is the deal. I don't hear you saying that your mom or your parents are being really mean to you, they are expressing anger as a direct result of some behavior on your part that you both realize and agree is unacceptable.
If they were just being mean to you for sport or for their own selfish reasons, I could understand your desire to be away from them.
Perhaps your mother has no real intention of sending you to a home, she is just at her wits end because you do not respect her rules or the rules of your school and are acting out in such a rebelious manner by skipping school when you are there to learn.
Until you are grown and capable enough of earning a decent living and can financially support yourself, you really do need to respect your parents who are supporting you and trying to raise you to be a responsible and happy adult.
They aren't raising children, they are raising you to be a self sufficient adult.
How do you expect to get there if you don't buckle down and learn something? At some point you will need to leave your parents and be on your own. Do not count on being a pretty young thing and marrying and never having to support yourself. Marriages fail, over 50% end in divorce. If you don't have any skills and have never worked you will be financially devestated when your husband leaves. Your mom won't be there to cook you free meals.
Try being more respectful to your mother and see if she does not annoy you less, tell her you appreciate what she does to take care of you....look around, who bought the clothes you are wearing, who provides for the nice roof over your head? Who pays for your activities? Who takes you on vacations? Who takes care of you when you are sick? Who bought you your first pet, or took you to buy your first bra? Who has stood by your side when someone treated you badly and unfairly? Who is working a job to provide these things for you while you have the luxury of sleeping late and skipping school? Try a little gratitude and see if your attitude does not change.
Stop skipping classes. No one likes a dumb girl. It isn't cool.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 February 2007): there is no way you can be put into care for skipping school,as social services like to keep families together not apart.im not siding with you by saying that,but did you even realize they take your parents to court and they both get fine £100 each or more who knows.im living proof i to had to go to court because my 16yr old wagged school,wotever you think about your mum think about what that money could be better spent on,play by your mums rules one day you will look back and realize what all the fuss about,be proud of yourself and go to school.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 February 2007): My,My,My. you r in quite a sticky situation. Being 16 can be VERY hard and Moms can be hard too. If your mom gives you one more chance then GREAT!!! I hope she does. Sadly I dont know what to tell you when it comes to going away. I hope you dont have to. If you get another chance thn listen to her get good grades and make her PROUD!!! Then you'll see that that makes life a lot easier at home and at school. I hope the best for you.
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A
female
reader, cd206  +, writes (24 February 2007):
 The teenage years are difficult between any mother and daughter but especially when the mother takes out all their unhappiness about their own life on you. Trust me, similar experiences. I'll never be thin enough or intelligent enough or good enough in general for my mother but I think the trick is realising that all that's okay because you're happier than her. You're sixteen at the youngest. It won't be long until you graduate and you can get away from her and it sounds that apart from her things are pretty good in your life at the moment so this is my advice. Apologise. Tell her you did a stupid thing but that you love her and hope she can forgive you. Then cross your fingers. If she does let you stay here's another tip I found for dealing with my own mother. Agree with everything she says. She tells you you're ruining her life, you say you know you are. She tells you she doesn't deserve it, tell her she's right, she doesn't. This will wind her up far more than you continuing to misbehave.
CD
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 February 2007): there is nothing that we could do to stop your parents.
you parents did warn you that they were going to send you to a home if you ditched one more class.
parents are parents because they love you and want the best for you. your parents will always be there for you through the bad and good times. will your friends and boyfriend be there for you at all times??
this is a lesson that you will have to live with and learn.
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