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female
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anonymous
writes: Me and my lover of 2 years are happy except when it comes to one thing ... He wants sex all the time. He can't cuddle or be next to me with out touching or being sexual, even when other people are around. I think he has sex with me in my sleep! How can I get him off of me? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, shania  +, writes (23 November 2005):
 This fella of yours need a cold bucket of water thrown at him! While it is nice to be desired,it is not nice to be treated like a sex object or a piece of meat.Why cant he just give u a cuddle or a loving kiss without him trying to get your knickers off? Affection doesnt mean that you have to lie on your back and having to put up with the groping and what ever else he has in mind.You will have to speak to him and tell him firmly that this is not acceptable.Iv got a feeling that you probably did tell him all this but it has gone in one ear and out the other.And as for him having sex with you while you are asleep,im afraid he is abusing your body.Is this what you have got to look forward to for the next 50yrs? The other agony aunt is right,you are not a blow up doll,you are a human being.Make sure he remembers that.
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reader, anonymous, writes (23 November 2005): Goodness dear, you have a pretty randy, loving, exuberant fellow there. The key is to compromise. Talk openly and tell him, you are willing to meet halfway, he just has to remain in control, when you are out with friends or in public. about your comment about him "having sex with you in your sleep". I can't tell if that was just a light, comedic comment about his high sex drive or if he really does do this? Remember, sex should only consensual-no one has the right to use your body as a "depository" while you are sleeping.
I think it's nice that he desires and loves you so much, after two years in a relationship. But there is such a thing as way too much. Everyone has diverse needs and just let him know, you need the more emotional affection rather than the physical, all the time. Never be afraid to ask for what you want...your needs are important, as well. Perhaps have a chat with him and set some gentle boundries. Just ask him to get the sexual feelings under control-there is a time and place for that. Sometimes when guys, can't get that under control..they run the risk of making their loved one feel a bit objectified. If you are feeling this way, then he may be overdoing it. Have that talk with him, hun. Good luck.
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A
female
reader, gothica +, writes (23 November 2005):
look tell him how you feel . tell him that if he wants to be a horn dog then buy him self a blow up doll . seriously if he is capeable with humping you while you sleep he could be capeable of rape
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A
female
reader, www.chatterz.co.uk +, writes (23 November 2005):
You need to speak to him about the way he is making you feel, he may not realise it as often with relationships when you first start having sex you do it quite often. He may just have a higher sex drive that you. If he is having sex with you when you're asleep, that just isn't right and you need to put a stop to it as that could be classed as rape. Are you affectionate towards him at other times or is when the two of you are having sex the only time that you get close with each other? That could be another reason.
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