A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I've been married for a while, no kids. My partner is a lovely man and would do anything for anybody but he can be very opinionated regarding my weight and my looks. I had an affair, both of us have partners but are unhappy. For the small while he made me feel beautiful. I'm too scared to tell my husband. I'm in love with this other person, should I just walk from both situations and start afresh, I don't know if I have the strength, I'm on anti depressants and I feel totally lost.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 February 2008): I think you would have more strength by being on your own because that way you can make a clear decision about either man from a neutral position. Without making it sound like a competition between them I think by taking a 'look' at both options in this way and testing your real feelings you will make the best choice for YOU. You should explain to your husband why you are doing this - whether you mention the other guy is up to you but I don't think it is essential if you are to live on your own for a while. It could give you the breathing space you need and possibly improve your confidence levels too (counselling could help YOU and does not HAVE to be about your relationship) - being with a man that criticises you all the time cannot be helping. As you have no children you have nothing to lose in taking this half-step.
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