A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I've been married for 4 years now.My husband is obsessive about the idea of us having a threesome with his friend.He keeps telling me how good the threesome would be, but there's two factors that put me off it:First of all, the guy's 64, and secondly, a threesome doesn't sound so hot with a 64-year-old guy does it?He's shown me photos of the guy and said "He's in better shape than me, and he's no boring old OAP, he's a good mate of mine, his wife died 12 years ago and been single ever since. He's a great guy, not boring... absolute hoot! Look how ripped his body is!" (my husband showed me a photo of him topless on his iPhone).He then told me how the guy used to work on motor race tracks for a living and repair race cars in the 1980s in Australia.Normally he isn't this insistent about a threesome, but why this guy?Even if I were OK with it(and I'm not), what would be the biggest sexual problems with a threesome of two people in their 30s and a 64-year-old man? Apart from jealousy that is... but a 64-year-old probably won't provide that.FFS, the guy looks like Santa Claus and that probably isn't sexy, even with a ripped body!My husband works out a lot, has a very ripped body and I do too, but he keeps insisting I'm zaftig, although me being large is just due to genetics, not diet (rather ironically, I eat a lot of Mediterranean/Italian food and cook a lot - so why I'd be overweight I don't know... no expert on cooking, but my culture's cuisines probably have a lot of emphasis on fresh ingredients). He doesn't demean me in other areas of my life, but keeps insisting I'm "a very zaftig woman who can't get a ripped body like me!"I'm gonna admit, my sex life is very vanilla, but sex and romance go together for me.I've only met the guy now and then, and he seems like a nice enough guy.I've told my husband that this feels wrong, but he said "I've done your sexual fetishes.... now please try one of mine, it'll be great in reality".For me, it'd feel wrong, partially due to cultural reasons (half-Italian) and also I've never been the sort of woman to sleep around.I'm concerned about this, and despite discussing it with him, he's quite insistent about this, saying "I really want to take life to its fullest now we've had coronavirus killing life for a bit".Has he got a devil-may-care attitude or a midlife crisis, or something else?I married my husband thinking I'd got a great guy... but now I'm wondering if sexually, we're incompatible, me wanting a good sex life and romance, him wanting threesomes and experimentation.I do love him and can't say I'm questioning how well I knew him, since I've known him since I was 16, we didn't see each other again until I was 28.My problems relate to our sex life, basically
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jealous, overweight, sex life, threesome Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (6 March 2021): Tell your husband that you don't need a pimp - manager - you can sort out your own sexual services if you are that way inclined. Write up and show him a price list and conditions of business if you were to become a prostitute.
i.e.
Cuatomers must be aged 20 - 40, well presented, clean, attractive.
Sex is £5000 per night, no discounts.
My guess is that your very old man would jump at the chance of having sex with you, even if only because you are so young. But he can't be anywhere near as fit as your husband claims or he would already have a reasonable sex life and be able to go to another woman when he fancies it.
Your husband is a total idiot, and very selfish. Expecting you to behave like a pimped our prostitute. If it were me I would get rid of him and get a real man, one with a brain and a heart.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 March 2021): He wants a more spiced up sex life, but threesome isn't your cup of tea. Think of something sizzling that you are good with. Maybe try sex outdoors, in a car, a blindfold blowjob. playact: salesman has his way with slutty housewife, rent a room dress sexy and go alone to the bar, flirt with some guys and have husband pick you up like a stranger.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 March 2021): Has he made this proposition to his friend and has his friend consented to this? TBH I don't think a decent 64 yr old guy would be fool enough to make a spectacle of himself with a couple half his age. Why doesn't this guy marry surely there are a lot of highly sophisticated mature women around him if he is such a hot guy? I say your husband is bored with the vanilla and just wants to spice up things but doing it this way is playing with fire.
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A
male
reader, kenny  +, writes (5 March 2021):
 If you take part in this fantasy of his i can't see anything good coming from it, only resentment and heartache further down the line.
Like Honeypie told you, look around DC at previous threesome questions, you will see time after time people saying its a bad idea, now their relationship/marriage is over, or on the rocks.
You don't want to do it, you don't agree with it, and is insulting he is even insisting on you doing this.
Tell him you absolutely don't want to do this, if he keeps on about it, well show his where the door is.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (5 March 2021):
 Just tell him ONCE and for all, this is not going to happen, I'm not interested and if you keep asking you can pack your bags. I'm not your personal porn star. I don't want sex with other men. I get that you think it's a "got" thing to do but it's not going to happen. And I feel a bit insulted that you even ask. I'm not here to "cheer" up your single friend sexually. The end.
I mean how HARD it is to set so clear boundaries?
There is no faster way to ruin a marriage than add another person to the bedroom. Just look around here on DC and you will find post after post of people regretting swinging and doing a 3-some.
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