A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My husband is jealous of a dating Sim (similar to otome) visual novel romance game. Recently he came across some pictures I'd saved of one of the sex scenes between the sprites (it's all dialogue) to show to my friend. He got mad that 1) I had picked a black male sim and 2) that I was "paying to fuck a sprite". First, I don't name my characters after me, they are separate characters and they all look different. Second, I'm a fanfic writer so of course I save screenshots (he doesn't know I write basically erotica). Please don't lecture me about my fandom life. It is normal and healthy and my fandom is made up of about 98% women all "romancing" sprites with their avatars. What can I do about my husband?
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male
reader, Billy Bathgate  +, writes (19 May 2018):
It’s normal and healthy and it’s damaging your marriage. Decide what is more important to you, your online sex life or your real married life then jettison the one you can’t live without.
My guess is your husband will be out.
A
female
reader, DancerGirl1984 +, writes (18 May 2018):
I'm sorry but I had to laugh. Tell your husband to grow up and get a life. It's a game, not reality lol.
What I did find sad was that you can't be open and honest about your writing to your husband. You should feel comfortable enough to embrace your passion with your husband and vice versa.
My Daughter is into Anime and Japanese cartoons and is also a writer and Fandom. I don't know much about it but I support her passion as it makes her happy.
Be open with your husband no matter what. If he disapproves then it is a insecurity on his part and something for him to work on.
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A
male
reader, TylerSage +, writes (18 May 2018):
 This doesn't sound all that different from a romance novel girls love reading. The only difference here is that you have complete control over the affairs of the characters and you have visuals. It's like playing with dolls.
As long as you can assure your husband you don't have plans to cheat on him with a burly black man any time soon it shouldn't be a problem, however it does make him insecure so you must understand that it could take a toll on the marriage.
Follow your bliss, but sometimes our bliss can hurt those around us. Discretion must be used in this situation but sometimes it might just need best to find an empty room, close the door and bask in your own privacy.
All the best.
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A
female
reader, Andie's Thoughts +, writes (17 May 2018):
 I second Honeypie. All I'd add is that many delve so deeply into it for escapism because their own relationship is lacking romance. Perhaps continue the simulation game, but focus more on revitalising your marriage.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (17 May 2018):
 Do you spend more time "romancing" imaginary characters than your husband?
For me that is what it comes down to.
Why did he bring it up? Does he feel neglected?
And why so defensive?
"Please don't lecture me about my fandom life. It is normal and healthy and my fandom is made up of about 98% women all "romancing" sprites with their avatars."
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