A
male
age
41-50,
*urles
writes:Dear Cupid,I need help!I was going out with this girl for 5years.For the 5year we've been apart, me Africa and she USA.Recently her parents called me to visit them which i did in the evening, they told me their daughter is getting married in 3weeks because of stay permit, and she and the guy have called them so they deem it respectful to tell me. As for my girlfriend, i haven't heard anything from her and i feel i don't need to ask her anything, am i right? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, Curles +, writes (15 November 2008):
Curles is verified as being by the original poster of the question I'm really grateful to everyone who took the time to answer, this site is real! now i know there's nothing i can do so i need not contact her, i ain't thinking about it no more, but i wanted to be clear of future consequences cuz i know the world is a small place and 'what goes around comes around' so i need to left positive footprints everywhere i go. thanks a lot.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 November 2008): Sweetheart I am so sorry. But honestly if you have been living on two different continents for 5 years, and she is marrying someone else without bothering to tell you about it, then I don't think this woman is your girlfriend. This is a pretty huge thing to not tell your boyfriend about directly.
There are huge consequences in the US for people who get married just for credentials. So I would say that it is likely more than that. i don't know a lot of guys who would marry a woman just for that reason alone. This man has feelings for her, or they are marrying for real and the parents thought telling you that would soften the blow.
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A
female
reader, Undercover Lover  +, writes (15 November 2008):
Ok so I don't have a solution for you but I am going through the same thing, only difference being that my ex told me his intention early on in our relationship and I made the mistake of staying with him ( I was bound to get hurt)I think that the fact that she didn't tell you shows how much she cares for you and on that basis alone I would not contact her. My ex has already got married and I have just decided to end contact with him because I began to noticed that if I didn't ring him, he would not ring me. I am a firm believer in "actions speaking louder than words" and after 5 years of being with her, you deserved more than a second hand message from her parents. I am not sure if this helped and if you want to discuss further, message me.
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