A
male
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:She's my first girlfriend and we've been together almost a year. It seems she has always wanted me to be more of a boyfriend and do more things for her, though she's told me I'm getting better at it and then she'll just tell me again later she still wants more from me. I just want some ideas for little things I can do for her besides just buying her something. I want to make her happy with nice surprises but I'm just not a spontaneous person Reply to this Question
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male
reader, dougbcoll +, writes (3 February 2016):
 if you are giving your heart to her ,there is very little else you can give to her that has value. things you can give her, time, conversation, caring, listening. these should have great value to her.
how about walks in a park. being a gentleman opening doors for her, flowers with a card ( i know that is buying) but with the card how about writing and filling the card up with your thoughts from your heart what she is to you ,and your love to her.
if you want her to see goodness in you why don't you offer to help her parents with something around her house.
money can not give her what your heart and kindness to her can give.
A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (2 February 2016):
 Okay so she wants more from you, are you getting anything from her? Does she make an effort in this relationship? Or is she just expecting you to do all the work. Be careful here that you don't end up being someone you are not. It is okay not to be spontaneous, that's just who you are. She needs to be more clear about what she wants.
She seems to be putting a lot of pressure on you, but you don't mention her doing small things for you to show you that she appreciates you. Maybe she is just bringing you down?
She is bored? Maybe try cooking her dinner, going for romantic walks, go for a picnic? A concert? Do something that you both enjoy but remember a relationship should be 50/50.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (2 February 2016):
 I's BOT about buying her "stuff". (or it shouldn't be). Bit maybe plan some dates that doesn't involve sitting around watching TV or you playing computer games (if that is the issue).
What is available in your town or neighboring town, that might be fun to do? (that you think SHE might like too)
Maybe try arraigning some outing that are different than usual. And if that doesn't work, have her SPELL out exactly what it is she is expecting. Maybe she isn't really being realistic in what a relationships is all about.
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A
male
reader, Denizen  +, writes (2 February 2016):
 If you are doing everything you can think of then that's all you can do. If she isn't happy with you then you both need to find a more suitable mate. You can't spend your life running to catch up. It sounds as if you are under the thumb. Be yourself.
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