A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I needd help!!! I have been mates with this guy for over a year now. We got chatting through a friend of ours via email, and soon started to chat on the phone. We got on very well, it was nice to have someone that understands me. Well we had at the time just come out of long term relationships and both had agreed that we are just mates and nothing more. Until we met up! he kissed me and things got a little to much, i put a stop to it as didnt know what i wanted! and didnt want it to end up as just a 1 night thing!!! So we carried on as friends and slowly i started to like him more then friends. Since the day we first chatted on the phone (a year ago) we have been talking everyday and night and never missed a day! we go out all the time and he asked to meet my mates, and my sister. Anyway a few months back around march time he found out from a friend of mine that i like him more then friends!!! well hell kicked off!!! he said he dosent like me more then a friend! we met up to sort thing out face to face and decided we will cut down on are contact. He then started to cry!!!! i have never seen him do that before! he cried and said he dosent want to hurt me, and dosent want to lose me as a friend! and the thought of cutting back was killing him. That confused me!!! But a while later i told him i was going on a date and he was so upset. The next day after my date, he was going mad!!! telling me all kinds of thing! like how stunning i am, how any man will be lucky to be with me! how he wishes that we could both be single so that will would never have to second best for each other!!! and now we still talk everyday, if anything he rings me 5 times a day now! I just dont know what to do any more! i like him more then a friend, he tells how beautiful i am every time! but will never do anything! I have had a very bad last relationship and do not trust men anymore! but i trust him so much, i know every little thing about him!!!Its driving me mad! My mates alway say that me and him act like a couple, and say they just dont understand why we are not together! And that dose upset me a lot, as everyone keeps questioning me! Sorry this was long, but is vey hard to put a years worth of story into a short story. There has been many more things that everyone of my mates go mad and say that he is showing me everything that a partner would Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 August 2010): Sounds to me like he really likes you... but he is afraid that taking it to the next step. Why would that be the case? I think it's because he feels that as friends you can be together without the fear of losing you. Once you cross over to a relationship there is no going back. Once you are lovers ..if that ends so might your friendship. It's fear of commitment and if he has had a bad break-up it is very possible that is what is going on.
What do you do about it? If it was me, I would tell him how I feel about him, how wonderful I think he is. If you see him all the time, I would look for that moment to take it to the next level. Gently touch him, look into his eyes... you know. And then when it feels right say you would like to try being more than friends. That you will take it slow.
|
