A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Im addicted with the perfect woman! I look at porn on the net and in mags, and all these women are made to look better that they actually are, so wen i go looking for a girl, i guess my expectations are too high. Im not the most attractive looking guy in the world, but not the worst. What should i do in this situation?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (15 December 2007): I look at totally beautiful women in porn all the time but it just isn't the same thing as real life. Models & porn chicks are flawless but they're also boring in that way.
Go out and meet some REAL women that exist in 3-D. Their faces are unique & interesting instead of cookie-cutter. Their bodies may have more fat & flaws but they have not already been fu*ked by hundreds of over-dicked meatheads and they have not already gotten totally bored with sex. You will actually matter to a real woman. They might actually challenge your mind & your perceptions & your willpower instead of just being a seviceable talking piece of meat.
And maybe you should go to work/school and to the gym instead of all the porno. If you're gonna have high standards then at least you could do everything you yourself can do to be more desirable. It won't cure your problem by itself, but just succeeding with one or two girls who were previously out of your reach might do wonders to break you out of this strong need for perfection.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 December 2007): To a degree you are just a normal lad who is going through adolescence. You'll learn soon enough that women you see in porn material are not the same as women you meet in real life.
Once you have sexually matured a little with experience and been with a few ladies - of varying physical beauty - you'll soon realise that the women you see in a porn video or magazine and a real-life women are two entirely different things and you'll be able to see the distinction.
But try to avoid too much porn viewing, excessive visual stimulation like that can cause harm to your view of women - but in a vast majority of cases it is temporary. Stop the porn, concentrate on building real relationships and friendships and I am sure you will be totally fine.
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A
male
reader, Dr. John  +, writes (14 December 2007):
 First of all you should give up the porn.
Easier said than done, I know. But the problems associated with it are not worth it.
Especially with sex in front of us at every turn, in television, movies, commercials and all other advertisements not to mention with almost every website you go to there is some kind of popup that tries to entice us to their website and that doesn't even include the errant keystroke that will sometimes take you right to a porn site.
Breaking away from a porn addiction can be one of the most difficult things to do but as you will see in a couple of links I am adding that what you are experiencing is just the tip of the iceburg.
Please read the articles at the links provided. I am sure they will be eye opening for you and offers practical advice.
The following quote is from the article at the second link and stresses just what you are already finding out.
"Pornography shapes attitudes and influences behavior. Its messages are enticing primarily because they are fantasy and thus presented as more exciting than the real thing.
Individuals using pornography set themselves up for unrealistic expectations leading to damaged relationships," notes one report.
Doc
http://www.filterguide.com/harmful.htm
http://www.watchtower.org/e/20030722/article_03.htm
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A
male
reader, harshbutfair +, writes (14 December 2007):
 Congratulations on realising that you have a problem.
Now you can take action. You need to give up porn.
There is a good website at http://www.no-porn.com that may be able to help. Try and figure out the situations when you're drawn to porn (time alone, being bored, feeling lonely) and introduce alternative activities to stop you falling into your usual trap.
Get out there and meet real women.
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