A
male
age
36-40,
*lyboy275
writes:Hello everyone, this might be a long one, but any help will be vastly appreciated.I was in a relationship up until about a day ago with a wonderful woman. We had met under social circumstances and everything seemed to fall into place. After being casual and sexual with eachother we started to date. We ended up dating for a year and a half. Guys, i fell in love with this girl, she was amazing, caring wonderful....everything i ever wanted in a partner. Our sex life was great, there was no complaints. Well about 8 months into the relationship, our sex life started to waiver.....she claimed that what she did when we first met was killing her and she was just a shell that wanted to get over old guys, and when she met me she fell in love with me and that didnt make it so important to be sexual anymore. I did get a little frustrated but i continued to try and make it work. I did seem to make sex a huge issue, and i think this might have pushed her away........well one day two weeks ago, we had a little tiff and she woke up telling me that she didnt know if she loved me anymore and she didnt know if she wanted to continue on with me.The thing is that she was acting very suspicioius, she had started texting quite a bit on her phone, she became active on trying to hide its screen from me and make sure that i didnt see anything she was saying. It got to the point that i asked her if she was cheating on me. She got very defensive and started crying telling me that she would never do that.........well one thing led to another and she broke up with me....i was heartbroken. I have spent every moment for a year and a half with this woman. I am in love with her and want to spend the rest of my life with her! No doubt....well two nights ago, i decided to do a little investigating. While she was at work i used a key (that i hadnt given back yet) to get into her house and look around. To my amazement her phone was in her room. I had to know......so i looked at the text messages. It didnt have that much in the memory, but it showed a string of sexual messages between her and her ex boyfriend starting just 30 minutes after we broke up. They were so incredibly explicit.......I was devistated!!!!I waited until she got back and confronted her.....all she said was that i had no right because we were technically broken up and that her and him were just JOKING because when they were together they thought texting like that was stupid and that the only reason she wanted to talk to him was to clear up issues about the past......I went ape shit, i told her i didnt want anything to do with her anymore and that i would come get my stuff later.....that set her off and we ended up in a knock down drag out scream fest where we called eachother everything in the book.....my question: Should i believe her? did she just text him after we were done? is that proper? what should i do because i want her back so bad?!
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reader, anonymous, writes (22 August 2008): I think you should just keep heading out that door and don't look back. True love dosen't do the things she has done ("I'm not sure I love you anymore." "Just had sex so you would fall in love." and to top it all off having sexual messages with a ex!!) Hello!?! That is totaly not a normal love thing...but I might add, it was a bit naughty of you to go into her house and look at her phone, Shame, shame on you!! Now that I have that out of my system, I must say that I agree with you, but think the best thing to do is find someone who loves you as much as you love them... and don't worry, she is out there.
~~The GabberJack
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