A
male
age
30-35,
*harmzy
writes:I know this isnt going to get me anywhere but i cant help it. Its been a year and shes still on my mind all day everyday. It feels like eternal limbo yknow what i mean? Shes currently in a relationship thats about a year long and yes we do still talk often. She tells me about her bf and i just try my best to act like a friend. She also told me that she's been flirting with this other guy but that she knows its wrong and she would nvr leave her bf. It kills me, all this. Idk what to do.
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male
reader, Sharmzy +, writes (25 December 2009):
Sharmzy is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for the feedback guys. Really appreciate it.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (24 December 2009): dude you need to either get on that or get away and dont look back if you can manage. i am speaking from experience. i was with this chick for nearly 3 years then some douche comes along and i could tell she liked him so i let her go bc she didnt have the balls to end it. worst mistake i ever made. they are married now. i shouldve done somethin sweet like blow all my savings buying 2 1way airline tickets to nowhere or maybe a tiny little baby tiger cub she could have as a pet til it got too big. long story short jibberish aside... don't make my mistakes I still think about that girl everyday and its been 2 years since all that. i need 2 get my head checked...
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (23 December 2009): Reduce your continuing contact with her.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 December 2009): You can't make someone or talk someone out of loving another person so anything I say may have little effect on how you feel about her. The only thing that will make you get over someone is time. But in order to make that time count you need to cut all contact with her cold turkey. Concsiously or not she is giving you hope of a reconciliation. But its false hope. If she really cared for you shed be with you not with this other guy. is it worth loving someone who won't love you back? That's not real love. Love is letting go. Love is loving yourself first and foremost. The fact that you love someone who isn't loving you back shows that you are not prioritizing your own needs (as clearly they are not being met) and therefore, at the moment, you don't love yourself. Its impossible to love someone else if you don't love yourself. This isn't real love that you are feeling, perhaps its a power play an ego thing but its not love. Perhaps knowing and realising this will help you move on. Real love is so different. Its reciprocal. Put your ego aside and let her go. Ytour life will be so much more fulfilling and rewarding. Take a chance.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 December 2009): Just be honest. Be honest with yourself and your intentions and be honest with her.
If in the end you talking to her about it makes your friendship end, then maybe that's what you need for you to move on.
I've been in that boat. Mine even came back around and didn't end up working. I waited for two years. But I was always honest with him so he knew exactly where I stood the whole time. We're still good friends, but we've both moved on. Was it worth waiting two years for? Absolutely not.
But I know exactly what you're going through.
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