A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: My ex has invited to me lunch tomorrow and now I can't stop thinking about it.We broke up because I'm leaving university and she didn't want to commit to a distance relationship. A few weeks after the break up she had a new boyfriend. We're trying to be friends, but I have no desire to stay in touch with her until I'm over her completely her. I'm leaving town in just over three weeks so I'm just trying to maintain our friendship until I leave. After that contact will naturally diminish further and I'll probably won't see her again.I just don't know how to feel. Sometimes I feel like I'm getting over her, but other times I feel like I'm back to square one, like now when I can't get something as simple as going to lunch with her off my mind. Going to lunch should be no big deal, so why am I finding this so hard? Is it normal?
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broke up, no desire, university Reply to this Question Share |
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female
reader, amandanash +, writes (2 May 2011):
When a break up is fresh and new, then it is very normal to have it be the only thing on your mind. And it's very normal to go back and forth between being over her and not.The best thing is time and distance. It sucks more than anything, cause it seems like the only thing you want to do is just call her up and hear her voice, or see her one more time. Keep things civil between the two of you before you leave, you don't even have to be friends for now. Going to lunch with her won't help you get over her at all if the break up is realativly new. But, if you're lacking closure in any way before you leave, it could provide that for sure.If you go to lunch, make sure you keep things civil and very platonic. If she doesn't know about you leaving, make it very clear. You will have many opportunities in life and wherever you go, dont' let one girl hold you back in any way
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