A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: I split up with my ex 3 and half years ago after a terrible time and I ended up taking anti-depressants and feeling dreadful. He has had other relationships and I have been with someone for 3 years. We work together and he has recently wanted to be friends. I thought I could handle it, but I can't. I want to talk to him as I really like his company and I don't really know anyone else like him, but the thought of him being with other women hurts. I still love him, very much. What should I do?
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female
reader, Cariola +, writes (25 April 2007):
that love is not going to fade easily especially when your still seeing him im in a simular situation myself i recently broke up with my boss and he said he doesnt want to lose me as a friend but i no that i couldnt see him with any one else sometimes if you still have these feelings its better not to still see them as the proverb says if you love someone then you have to let them go,
A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (19 April 2007):
I think for your own well-being you should wait on the friendship. You need to distance yourself for awhile so you can concentrate on your 3yr relationship. Sometimes absence doesn't make the heart grow fonder, it allows healing.
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A
female
reader, emily-jo +, writes (19 April 2007):
Hi
We'll it's up to you at the end of the day, and whether you feel comfortable seeing him with other girls, if you dont feel comfortable i would'nt even consider it, for it could make things alot difficult for you, and also for the other girls too.
He doesnt pressure you into being friends does he?
It's your decision huni, and whatever you decide he should respect that.
Did you split up because of your boyfriend and other girls or was it something different?
Let me know how you get on huni? i am here to help.
Emily-jo xx
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A
female
reader, elsie +, writes (19 April 2007):
its a pity that you have to work in the same place.seeing your ex all the time is a constant reminder of the past.its probably causing you to rerun things in your head about what went wrong.personally i think youd be safer just remaining aquaintances.everyone has an ex who they may still have feelings for.its just unfortunate that you have to see him.all of these rehashed emotions are making you feel unsafe.as you said you had a terrible time so you still have questions in your head probably wondering why he hurt you so much?look honey he made you feel down enough to have to go on antidepressants and you feel like you cant handle being around him.he isnt a magical person.hes your EX and for very good reasons.dont let it spoil what you have now.what your feeling is normal but stay in the safe zone.you say you still love him and if you chat how will you cope with just remaining friends?also how do you think you b/f will handle all this?think of him too.leave it as it is and think of yourself and your sanity.
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