A
male
age
36-40,
*akerz
writes:I'm a little confused about this situation and need some advice. My Ex-Girlfriend from about 1 1/2 years ago moved back into town a few months ago. She added me on skype and wanted to be friends again, well I wasn't sure about this at first because I still like her (she ended things to go to school across the country, which didn't work out) Well I finally gave in said it was Ok. She asked me a few times a week for about 2 weeks to come see her at work and have lunch sometime. So I was trying to be a nice guy and went and had lunch about 2 weeks ago and hung out afterwards and honestly I had a lot of fun. Well I've sent her a few text in the past week got 1 word answers a few hours later and she hasn't really said anything to me sense then. What do yall think is up?I'm starting to think it was just a game to see if I would come so she could have a good laugh on my behalf and she wasn't ever interested in being friends again in the first place... but honestly I dont know what to think at this point... and yes I'm a little hurt over the entire thing because seeing her again brought up alot of memories and feelings that I don't need right now if its not going to work.Thanks
View related questions:
at work, ex girlfriend, text Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, jakerz +, writes (30 June 2012):
jakerz is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThats kinda what I was thinking at first, but neither of us was really emotional during lunch, we laughed at a few things each other said etc... but at this point I dont really have anything to lose, so I may just call her up and see if she wants to get lunch again and ask her lolThanks!
A
female
reader, Abella +, writes (24 June 2012):
 hi
The memory will fade with time. Through yourself into some new uplifting activities that are positive and good.
Learn a new skill.
Get to the gym
Plan a holiday
Read some books you've always meant to read.
All the good things that make you strong, and help you heal.
Just don't drown your sorrow and don't do anything that drags you down.
If she's not worthy of you then consider it's a great thing that you have years ahead of you to find the ideal woman, for you.
Think about the attributes you need in a woman. It makes ie easier to spot the real-deal when she arrives,
And when you meet her you will cherish her and be thankful that you are Free to form a relationship with this charming, reliable, honest woman with integrity.
Best wishes for a good future and happiness.
Abella
...............................
A
male
reader, jakerz +, writes (24 June 2012):
jakerz is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThat's probably it, thanks for all the help :)
I'm starting to wish I could just delete every memory of her out of my head, the good and bad, lol. She knows how bad she hurt me... and if she's just doing this because I'm friends with her sister then she's a lot colder than I ever thought she could be.
...............................
A
female
reader, Abella +, writes (24 June 2012):
thank you for your follow up.I think you have nailed the reason she wanted to see you.IF, for a moment, she had thought you and her sister were starting to connect or even, maybe, likely to be interested in each other, then I think she would have suddenly renewed her interest in you, to get back at her sister.I think her anxiousness to see you again was, sadly, not about you. Instead it was:1.to ensure you and her sister were not together, but if indeed you were showing any potentil interest then.... 2. To renew things with you, to thwart her sister's potential interest.3. Discard you again once you were 'hers' again. Time will tell (another month) if her interest and her wish to see you was genuine, or had an ulterior motive perhaps like the senario.Warring sibling can have emotions and animosity that runs deepIn fact families can have all manner of 'issues' that contribute to families becoming dysfunional, sadly.Maybe her sister is your Ex's issue?Time will tell.RegardsAbella
...............................
A
male
reader, jakerz +, writes (23 June 2012):
jakerz is verified as being by the original poster of the questionYes, the dont like each other much lol. There 180 degrees apart. But I've made it clear to everyone I know that I do not want to date her sister so she could that info from anyone we know really.
...............................
A
female
reader, Abella +, writes (23 June 2012):
yes, i do think she wanted to resolve an issue in her head. Maybe she thought her sister and you had become an item.
Is there any tension between her and her sister? Would she ever distrust her sister?
Either way, whether she is playing a game on her sister or playing you it seems that she wasted your time.
I think the idea to give her one more month is fair and just.
Even if she changed her mind after meeting with you - her actions since your meeting are rude.
If you happen to see her sister in the future then talk about anything but your reluctant ex.
Best Wishes for the future
Abella
...............................
A
male
reader, jakerz +, writes (23 June 2012):
jakerz is verified as being by the original poster of the questionup the relationship and neither did she, it was just small talk any why she moved back mostly.
But I do plan on not talking to her unless she says something, and if it goes a month or so then I'll delete all my contact with her.
Oh there is one more thing, I'm good friends with her Older sister (she's 22 her sister is 24) this friendship started after we broke up and no I do not like her sister we're friends nothing more. and she knows this think that could have anything to do with it? lol
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 June 2012): It could be that she sensed you still have a lot of feelings for her where as she just prefers to be friends. Although ignoring you completely is a little harsh.
I'd not contact her and if you don't get any message from her within a month (just incase there has been a huge crisi) then delete her from your contacts and don't answer any further messages from her if they should happen.
...............................
A
female
reader, Abella +, writes (23 June 2012):
If she really did this to see if you are still interested in her then truly she is not worth the trouble.
It does sound incongruous that she spent so much time trying to encourage you to go to lunch.
You went to lunch, and by all accounts it was pleasant and you enjoyed yourself.
But then she put up the shutters again?
Very curious, unless she has a family emergency that she has not told you about.
Trust your Gut reaction on this
you know her better than most people. Did you ever see evidence in the past that she potentially could be manipulative and mean?
Because it certainly sounds like she wasnted something from you. Did she get the reaction she expected and wanted?
Or did she have something she wanted to ask you and then she backed away from raising it with you, once she was with you again?
which ever way you look a tit: she is certainly distancing herself from you now.
Perhaps you could choose in the future to ask her to explain herself.
Just take extra care with your heart.
If your Ex cannot see your true worth then you may be better developing a new relationship with a more discerning girl, who is genuine and worth the effort. And does not play (potentially) games.
...............................
|
