A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I hope someone will reply to this because i've got something on my mind i just need to write down. My dad has been with his girlfriend for 2years, she lives with us and i've just found really explicit messages sent in the history of our computer from his girlfriend to dozens of men on the internet saying she is single and a few explixit pictures also. My dad loves her to bits but i really don't know what to do, Do i confront my dad and tell him? or leave it as it is?. I dont want to hurt his feelings because my mum cheated on him too.
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female
reader, Astrid  +, writes (18 January 2007):
 show him the kinf of girl she is or tell his mate or another familiar like an uncle so he explains it to him without getting yourself into a mess
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A
female
reader, eternalleroze  +, writes (18 January 2007):
 I understand your need to protect you father from hurting , just like he might have done for you in the past.
However , I feel that you should have a heart to heart chat with his girlfriend , woman to woman , i understand she has sent explicit messages and explicit pictures , which can only lead to something worse ... but maybe she is not getting what she needs from your father , just like your mom didnt.
I am just asking you not to take sides , since she has been living with u all for 2 years , and you have accepted her as a part of his life and as an extention of a part of yours , you need to give her an honest chance.
To explain why ? and not in an accusing tone , but in a very mature and basic tone , try to understand her frame of mind , also explain to her how much your father loves her , and help in strengthening the relationship instead of hurting him or threatening her !
I am sure she will think about it and maybe even tell you why , however if it continues , i am sure your dad will find out about it ... at any point dont make him or her point at you for the cause of their break up.... cos tht will be a hard cross to carry even though you are right.
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A
female
reader, cd206 +, writes (18 January 2007):
 Despite the fact that you love your Dad I don't think it's your place to tell him as such. What would probably be better is to tell the girlfriend what you've found and ask her to explain it. I can't think of one right now but it's possible there's a very good explanation. Then, you can either convince her to stop doing this or to tell your Dad. Technically if you can convince her to give up doing it then your Dad doesn't need to know or be hurt again.
CD
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